Okay, first of all, I'm going to change the way you think about things: Silence the Snow White voice in your head saying to wait for your prince to come. Forget everything Disney taught you. Because, though I am a Disney child, born and raised, "Anastasia" got so much more right.
You know, in the romance area. As to historical accuracy, there is much to be desired. But ask me about that later.
So, instead of waiting around for your Prince Charming to show up, how about you wait for someone entirely different?
How about waiting for your kitchen boy?
Dimitri, ladies and gentlemen. He's literally the dream boat every little girl should dream of, and here is my proof to back it up.
1. He's smooth.
Check out the ease with which he pulls off this move.
2. He has brains.
Granted, he uses those to con innocent women into thinking they're royalty, but that's beside the point.
3. With Dimitri automatically comes Vlad.
You've literally got the best third wheel ever.
4. He's athletic.
Not that this is a deal breaker for me, certainly. But dang, look at the ease with which he handles that bicycle.
5. He can dance.
6. He can KISS!
7. This sweeping gesture.
Excuse me while I swoon and recreate this for my theoretical future engagement photos.
8. This is the only proper reaction.
Just look at him looking at her. LOOK AT IT!
9. He proves over and over again how much he cares about Anya.
Seriously, he saves her life about four times over the course of the film. However...
10. He's good with not being the rescuer all the time.
Because she saves his life a couple of times.
11. He is literally unable to conceal how he feels about this woman.
Once again, look at him looking at her. HE'S CRAZY ABOUT HER!
Even when she's mad and he's about to lose her.
Look at this precious human being.
12. He has the presence of mind to recognize when she needs him.
13. And he takes his slaps like a man.
Such a solid lad.
So, ladies of Disney, what do you think of your men now?
(Disclaimer: Adam, Aladdin, Flynn, and Kristoff, I'm totally kidding. Y'all are great.)
But seriously, Dimitri.
