With the recent release of his newest picture, "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood," it's time to take a look at all nine films Quentin Tarantino's directed and rank them up from worst to best. I tried to avoid any explicit spoilers as much as possible, but beware that some plot points and character qualities will be revealed.
With the warning out of the way, let's jump right in and begin:
#9: Death Proof
If you thought Tarantino couldn't make a bad film, this one might change your mind. With a plot summed up as "man kills women with car," it's a drag of a feature that you'll want to race through as quickly as possible.
Sure, it has stylistic editing and a quality soundtrack, but the movie's characters are remarkably unremarkable and quite frankly forgettable. All members of the main cast except one are given the monikers of "The Girls" in the opening credits, and their characterizations are equally bland in the film that follows.
The lone outlier is the antagonist, Stuntman Mike (Kurt Russell) (yes, that's the villain's frightening name), and his motive for his vehicular manslaughter is: he likes it. And this bland bore of a baddie is the only one to carry over to the second part of the film, as the others are swapped out at halftime as if it's a middle-school basketball game, and like a basketball, this movie is best passed on.
#8: The Hateful Eight
Coming in at #8 is "The Hateful Eight," and no, I did not just put it there for the number. Set post Civil War in a isolated stage-coach lodge in the middle of the winter, the travelers taking shelter at Minnie's Haberdashery are short on trust as Major Marquis Warren (Samuel L. Jackson) protects his killed bounties and John Ruth (Kurt Russell) keeps criminal Daisy Domergue (Jennifer Jason Leigh) in custody before taking her into town to hang.
The premise seems exciting, but it more or less plays out like a less enjoyable "Reservoir Dogs." There's the same idea of mistrust and close confines, but while the warehouse of "Dogs" created a kettle about to burst, the lodge of "Eight" seems to limit the possibilities more than create them.
Both Jackson and Leigh give excellent performances, but while the finale's twist is quite unexpected, it feels more cheap than surprising, adding a piece to the game that breaks the rule the title seems to imply. With a closing bloodbath that only increases the similarities between this film and "Dogs," by the end, you'll probably just wish you watched the other Tarantino film instead.
#7: Jackie Brown
"Jackie Brown" is well-written, well-shot, well-acted, and well-made; in short, it does it all quite well. But it's the only film on this list that, despite being directed by Tarantino, feels distinctly un-Tarantino.
With shots that purposefully move or frame themselves away from the violence and a plot that plays out mostly as you'd expect, the auteurist approach that made the director exciting seems watered down and almost non-existent. These choices aren't bad per se, but with the plethora of crime films out there, it's impossible to be remembered without making the movie your own.
The characters with their slightly-less-snappy-but-still-quality dialogue have the potential to be memorable players in a half-a-million-dollar scramble. Sadly, the standard story and absence of style place them in a picture easily forgotten.
#6: Kill Bill: Volumes 1 and 2
Before you drop your popcorn and pick up your pitchforks, let me say this: a valid argument could be made for any of these following six films to be Tarantino's best, and if all these films fell on a spectrum of cinematic excellence, "Kill Bill" would be extremely close to the #1 spot and miles away from "Jackie Brown." With that out of the way, let's talk wedding's gone wrong and assassin versus assassins in this terrific two-part feature.
With the Bride (Uma Thurman) journeying to Japan in Volume One, we are treated to the fantastically frantic showdown against the Crazy 88 as well as the final standoff versus O-Ren Ishii (Lucy Liu). In Volume Two, we're given the claustrophobic coffin scene, the fatal Five Point Palm Exploding Heart Technique, and the long-awaited face-off between our heroine and Bill (David Carradine).
The only reason the story of the Deadly Viper Assassination Squad isn't ranked higher is the lack of opportunity for emphatic acting that comes with everyone being a stoic, stone-cold killer. But that's hardly a complaint, for both parts pack punches, and Volume One contains what is arguably Tarantino's best action sequence, making this movie an extraordinarily memorable martial-arts flick.
#5: Once Upon a Time in Hollywood
The newest addition to the filmography family, "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood" takes us on a meandering ride through late-60s Los Angeles, following along actor Rick Dalton and his stunt-double Cliff Booth. Both characters are incredibly entertaining, thanks in no small part to their portrayals by Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt respectively, and the loose, laid-back plot lets this partner pair-up shine.
DiCaprio plays the erratic and emotionally insecure Dalton especially well as this TV cowboy frets over the soon end of his stardom, and scenes like the breakdown in the actor's trailer are at once saddening and hilarious. Booth's relaxed confidence doesn't give the same opportunity for wild shifts in demeanor while acting, but this chill nonchalance fits Pitt perfectly and allows for moments with this stuntman to be equally enjoyable.
The rose-colored backdrop of Hollywood is beautifully painted with a plethora of car rides through the city and an unsurprisingly excellent soundtrack, and although most of the trademark Tarantino violence is saved for the end, it is an explosive finale that is comedic, cathartic, and well-worth the lead-up. But it's the perfect combination of the two main characters that pushes this film up the rankings and into the #5 spot.
#4: Django Unchained
While "Kill Bill" had the action and "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood" had the acting, "Django Unchained" has both, making this tale filled with violent twists a top-tier Tarantino outing. As we ride along with Django (Jamie Foxx) and Dr. King Schultz (Christoph Waltz), we are treated to a revisionist story set in the South that is filled with a cast of despicable characters.
Leonardo DiCaprio does an excellent job as plantation owner Calvin J. Candie, who gives his horrific depravities an air of charming candor as he justifies his racism with the "science" of phrenology before bursting into a bout of rage. The senior house slave Stephen (Samuel L. Jackson) is another excellent antagonist to accompany Candie, and Schultz and Django are equally engrossing as their opponents.
The sudden unexpected shootout at Candyland plantation is a bloody battle of one versus many, and the explosive ending provides a satisfying finale for this wild film. Pulling out all the stops with entertaining heroes and villains and violent horrors and victories alike, "Django Unchained" is a movie to remember.
#3: Reservoir Dogs
Tarantino's first film falls just two shy of first place, but that's pretty impressive considering the budget of $1.2 million, which is considerably lower than those of his following works. Opening with a roundtable discussion of a Madonna song's hidden meanings and the ethics of tipping, and soon followed by a step-printed, slow-motion walk through the opening credits, this movie set the bar for the director's future features, and it set it high.
When their jewelry heist goes wrong, the remaining criminals coop themselves up at their rendezvous warehouse as they try to determine who survived, who among them is the rat, and what they're going to do with the stolen and now-hidden diamonds. It's an exciting plot premise that keeps you guessing, and rewatching the movie after knowing the reveal is equally rewarding.
All of the main cast are a delight, but the fast-talking professional Mr. Pink (Steve Buscemi) and potential sadist Mr. Blonde (Michael Madsen) steal the show. You'll never hear "Stuck in the Middle with You" the same way after observing the infamous ear-cutting scene, and "Reservoir Dogs" is a film to remember and watch again and again.
#2: Inglourious Basterds
Never before has milk been used for intimidation, but never before have we seen such a vicious villain. The first scene alone, which introduces the intelligently evil SS Colonel Hans Landa (Christoph Waltz), shows the two things that makes "Inglourious Basterds" so great: the villain and the tension.
As Landa sets about on the trails of both Shosanna Dreyfus (Mélanie Laurent) and Lieutenant Aldo Raine (Brad Pitt) and his Basterds militia group, he seems to be an inescapable evil always a couple steps ahead. The soundtrack only heightens the intensity through well-selected songs, such as the use of "The Entity" music when the Colonel appears at the same restaurant as Shosanna.
The tavern scene with Lieutenant Archie Hicox (Michael Fassbender) is even more tense, and the final chaos in the cinema makes for an action-packed end that is soon followed by a deal gone wrong which grants one character quite the comeuppance. With more than enough exciting sequences and sudden twists and delivering one memorable antagonist, "Basterds" belongs amongst the best on this list.
#1: Pulp Fiction
No surprise here. Yes, this movie has been slightly over-lauded for a long time, but if any Tarantino picture deserves that kind of treatment, it's "Pulp Fiction." Taking inspiration from many past films for some of its most famous scenes, it's a crime-filled flick crammed full of iconic lines that showcases the best cinema has to offer.
The opening diner scene followed by "Miserlou" kicks things off with a bang, and the ensuing chapters contain so many memorable moments it'd be hard to keep count. From the "Royale with cheese" to foot massages to divine intervention and the path of the righteous man, there's so many parts of this movie that have been engraved in pop culture, and those four examples were all from the first chapter's prelude.
Its story of Los Angeles criminals doesn't follow chronological order, and the lack of it works wonders for both the pacing and the plot. The tightly-woven tale is never in a lull for too long, and there's more than enough flavor in this film to place is at #1.
Until Tarantino releases his tenth and supposedly final film, that's the end of our list. Agree or disagree with the rankings, the most important thing to remember is that you gotta have an opinion.
Going to the cinema alone is good for your mental health, says science
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