When I walk home late at night after a party. When I am alone with a man. If I ever find myself in the position to make a difficult choice about my body. These are situations that have always been painted as women’s issues, problems that men think they never need to worry about. Sexual assault, domestic abuse, sexual harassment, and reproductive rights are just the start of the list. But what do these problems have in common?

Women are told that they need to change the way they behave to prevent these issues, despite the fact that these are men’s problems just as much as women’s.

Does it matter more that I wore a tiny yellow dress when I was walking home with someone who was supposed to be my friend, or that my supposed friend decided that it was “his right” to force himself on me? Is it more offensive that I am too “cowardly” to leave my boyfriend, or that he feels entitled enough to hit me in the first place? Should it be only my fault that I was not on birth control, or the man who knew that I wasn’t when he didn’t use a condom?

Thirty years ago and earlier, men were raised to believe they were entitled to receive everything and anything they set their mind to. Parents taught their beloved little boys all the things they could accomplish in life by simply being a boy. Fathers taught their boys to never stop pursuing the head cheerleader, because she had to say yes eventually, right? These boys grew up to think they could have any job they wanted, and along with that, any woman that they wanted. Thirty years later, despite the leaps and bounds women have made in securing the rights that we deserve, this mindset has not left us. We see this attitude in beloved TV shows like How I Met Your Mother. No matter how many times Robin rejects Ted, don’t worry everyone! Ted eventually wears her down and they end up together at the end of the show. When men like Ted were growing up, women were to be chased, to be had, to be possessed.

But now it’s 2016. Women are powerful, strong, and driven, and it seems that parenting hasn’t been able to catch up to the times. Rather than teach boys that playing sports with girls on the playground is okay, they are taught girls are fragile. Rather than teach boys that actions have consequences, they are taught that they are entitled to get what they want. They are taught they have the “right” to women.

They are taught, of course, “boys will be boys.”

This sort of teaching leads to Brock Turner believing he was entitled to perform his hideous crime, and it leads to the Judge Aaron Persky handing him a free pass because to him, Turner seemed like a poor boy that that made a mistake. It led Brock Turner’s father to insist his son was a good boy whose future should not be compromised by “twenty minutes of action.” This teaching even leads to men like Ryan Lochte, someone who should be a role model to young boys in America, defacing a store in Brazil and making up an elaborate story to get out of trouble.

Raising boys to believe they have a right to anything they want leads to the problems that have for so long been treated as women’s problems: sexual assault, domestic abuse, and so on. And yet, women are continued to be told ways they need to change their behavior in order to prevent such acts. The only way to truly end these problems is to change the mentality of “boys will be boys” and the privilege of being a male. Boys cannot continue to act, or be parented, the way they did in 1973. The world has changed. So should they.