Often times, I think people forget that they themselves are more important than anyone else they know. While they are busy caring for and making sure others have what they need, they forget to do the same for themselves. They forget to make decisions that please them, instead of trying to please someone else - and a lot of times, what makes someone else happy, doesn't necessarily make yourself happy. I am not saying, to act selfishly and all of a sudden care for nobody but yourself, but I am saying that it's okay to put yourself first occasionally, and think and do what makes you the happiest before anyone else.
You will do more damage than good if you continue to put other things before yourself. I've made the mistakes of doing things for the sake of my friendships or relationships before thinking about myself. I try and do what might make other people in those relationships and friendships happy for the sake of keeping the friendship or relationship instead of what will make me happy, and a lot of times the two don't coincide. I've learned from those mistakes because each time I try to do what's best for the relationship or for the person and not myself, I find myself a little distraught and unhappy.
Not only does putting yourself first have to do with relationships with people, but also has to do with your sanity and health. It is important to take care of yourself and not run out of gas, constantly trying to please another person when that time and energy could be used on you. Then, when you know you're okay, and able, and willing, you can start to use that left over energy on other people.
From what I've seen and experienced, a friendship and relationship can only work if both parties are happy, and if they both make time for themselves instead of constantly being wrapped up in the other person, because that's when people start losing themselves. They start thinking that what they want is what the other person wants, when really it may not be so.
Life should not be about making other people happy. Life should be about making yourself happy - as cheesy as it sounds, it's true. Why go through life making yourself miserable for the sake of another person, who may or may not be reciprocating the same actions? On some ends, it is worth it to go out of your way to make others happy, but if it causes you unhappiness and no time for yourself, then you should not be doing it. So before you go out of your way to do something for another person before yourself, ask yourself, "Does this make me happy? Is this what's best for me?"
