When I was a child, I pictured myself in college as a guy who would wear flip-flops every day, have a long, flowing beard, own t-shirts of bands that had never played to an audience of more than 500, and would always, always, wear a guitar on his back. Even in the shower. Especially in the shower. It's part of the college aesthetic to have an instrument with you, because youth and music go together like being old and not liking the youth or their music. There are certainly advantages of adhering to this image of the college instrumentarian (I make up words) and bringing your instrument to school, but there are also things to be wary of.
These are some pros and cons to consider when thinking of bringing your instrument to campus.
Pro: You always have something expensive to smash.
Con: Many people are allergic to music.
Pro: Many record producers hang out in college dormitory lounges to listen for potential new artists.
Con: The dean is allowed to steal your instrument if he or she doesn't like you.
Pro: If you can make your music make sense with another peer's music, you can make two successful musics at one time.
Con: Your instrument can become more successful and well-liked than you, in which case your GPA is transferred to it.
Pro: You can use your proficiency at your instrument to attract potential lovers, and pets.
Con: The taste of Girl Scout cookies is made no sweeter by your having an instrument.
Pro: An instrument can get you out of a foreign language requirement if you say, “Music truly is the universal language. Thank you, and good night," after each time you play.
Con: Your instrument can become an extension of yourself, which makes daily activities like showering and golfing difficult.
Pro: If your heart is filled with magic, the furniture and appliances in your room will come to life, sing, and dance, when you play a song.
Con: The English language may begin to appear to you as musical notation.
Pro: You can severely aggravate your neighbors.
Con: You almost certainly will become, thoroughly and completely, a tool.
Pro: If you draw a face on your instrument with marker, and lose all control of your sanity, an instrument can become a friend.
Con: Instruments can be expensive to feed.
Pro: Material things bring happiness.
Con: English majors who don't know they aren't funny may swallow your instrument, saying, “this instruMINT is terrible," as they violently choke to death.
Pro: Fedoras will magically begin to fit on your head.
Con: You'll stop appreciating Mumford & Sons when all of the songs you write sound like theirs.
Pro: Instruments will guarantee you a fulfilling career after school.
Con: Just kidding.
