In this world, there is an unspoken game of happiness. When you press play, you make yourself vulnerable to society and your past. Not everyone wins this game, and I certainly haven't won more than a couple of times, but we all try our hardest.
Here's to the ultimate challenge in life.
Ring Ring! Ring Ring!
Shove. Shake. Stumble.
My reflection stares back at me.
The water flows and the breeze is cold
I smile and my eyes sparkle.
There is no time to waste.
I pack up.
Sit down.
And push my worries as far as possible
Today is my day.
There is an ache in my stomach.
I know failure is lurking somewhere,
But I ignore it.
I close my eyes and look at the sky.
Today is a special day.
You know why?
Because today,
I will go somewhere others can’t follow me.
I don’t know how things work here.
So I ask for help.
It isn’t the same useless drag I go through every day.
It’s new, so it hasn’t been ruined yet.
Left. Right. Left. Right.
My eyes flutter to every interesting person in front of me.
Some are bright and awake.
For others, this is their jail.
The train starts moving.
I hear those random people once again
Not with my ears
But with my eyes and my mind.
Some are weeping on the inside.
They just escaped their nightmares.
Some are chatting.
It’s just a regular day for them.
Some are in their own world.
They are the dreamers.
For them, their only escape is their imagination.
Because their fears are reality.
Some are lifeless.
They are the sleepers.
They won’t wake up.
Their fears have won.
I wonder what they think of me,
But time is running out.
I say goodbye and part ways with them.
Today is great,
But today is also dangerous.
If I am not careful,
Today can kill me.
Eyes open. Alert. Moving.
Blink.
I was too naïve.
It bombarded me from both sides.
What was once happiness,
Turned into cruel laughter.
There was no way today was going to be perfect.
How dare I think I can be happy?
I made a mistake.
I thought that if I brought one part of my past,
I can still explore anew.
But uh oh.
The old part turned out to be cancerous
Now, the new is ruined.
Game over.
Sadly, I forgive your past.
It didn’t know any better.
It didn’t know how much I was looking forward to this day.
It has problems of its own.
I leave,
Saving my strength and hope for another day.
This day has ended,
'My day' is offically a 'some day'.
