I crave a depth that is beyond me.

Something beyond automated monotony.


And I search for it,

dig for it like precious gold

But all those holes--are in the wrong places.

Because all I find are false nuggets.


I strive for intimacy on social media.

I strive for immortality with every photo.

I strive for worth in productivity.


I am lookin for depth in the shallow end.

We are all being fooled.

But there are moments where the ground dips down

and I get a glimpse of the deepness life holds,


a moment of staring into a strangers' eyes,

and seeing beyond what their label implies


a moment of staring into the sunset,

and reveling in God's promise met


a moment of seeing someone greatly struggle,

and sharing their human being-ness that humbles


a moment of clarity in purpose,

of pursuing a mission beyond the surface.


I don't think i can jump into the deep end yet,

I would drown in the burdens of the world

and the magnanimity of love still left,

but I can start easing inch by inch

into the depth that I crave

into the depth of true presence

into the depth of connection

into the depth of sorrow

into the depth of solidarity

into the depth of prevailing love

and maybe one day,

I'll touch the bottom

and reach the depth my soul longs for.


But, with God's love

I think I'll be forever swimming

downward...