"I just want people to understand."

"If they just knew where I was coming from, then they would see that I'm right."

Sound familiar?

The truth is, we can talk until we are exhausted, but none of the above statements will come true. We cannot change someone's mind, beliefs, or positions by simply forcing them to see it our way. Yet we are all guilty of doing so from time to time.

The most common time that this occurs, for me, is when someone doesn't know how I'm feeling. It's very important to me to try explaining where I'm coming from. Sometimes it's productive, but other times it's useless. In fact, most times, it's useless. Especially when they don't deserve the vulnerability and guts that it takes for me to explain.

When someone is mad at you for feeling a certain way, just let them be mad. You're entitled to the way you feel. You don't owe anyone a reason. Honestly, they probably already know why you're hurt, annoyed, or disappointed. They're probably the ones who caused you to feel that way. Being mad at you gives them validation and helps them to justify their actions.

So save the long text message that explains your emotions, even if you're tempted to send it. There are many of these that I wish I hadn't sent. Confide in those who care or don't tell anyone at all. Instead, buy a journal and pour yourself into the pages. Do whatever it takes for you to accept the situation and to cleanse yourself from the negativity.

Let them think what they will. If you can lay your head down at night and know that you did your best to treat people right, then you're doing pretty well. Remember that you deserve peace and forget anything, or anyone, that causes chaos.

“Don't waste your time with explanations: people only hear what they want to hear.”
― Paulo Coelho