Playing Hard To Get, or Just Hard To Get?

Playing Hard To Get, or Just Hard To Get?

If someone is genuine and wish for their embrace, show them your heart.

Playing hard to get is quite the tricky dating tactic, but nonetheless, one our generation dabbles in. You’re interested, occasionally, available, sometimes, but yet always intriguing. Does it really work? Are you playing hard to get, or are you just hard to get? Here’s what I think, you’re just hard to get. Playing hard to get never works, but rather is a distraction from the relationship you desire. You’re wasting time playing games with people who are 1) interested in nothing more than your mystique and 2) not worth your time. Playing hard to get makes you mysterious for a little while, until you finally think they're worthy enough to have your heart, and suddenly you're left vulnerable, transparent, and no longer interesting. So it’s simple, if you find yourself having to play hard to get, save yourself the hard part and get far away.

I understand why you play hard to get, let's face it, most people do. It's near impossible to wear your heart on your sleeve in a world constantly rejecting your imperfections. Contrary to popular belief, hiding your heart will not detract from disappointment, or find you the relationship you desire. For it is when we show our true self to others, and only then, that we receive our most intense love from the most permanent people stemming from understanding, and acceptance. Authentic love, in which you will be loved wholly and unconditionally—for the good, the bad, and the downright ugly.

If someone is genuine and wish for their embrace, show them your heart. Put yourself out there amidst the consequences. Because for someone is to be infatuated with you due to your essence of mystery, they aren't seeing you inside-out. They don’t know, nor care, for your heart. And well, a relationship without heart is nothing more than dreadful heartache.

Cover Image Credit: Me, Myself, & I

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10 Signs You Found Your Person

These are just some of the signs you might see if you've truly found "the one".

I have been lucky enough to spend the last year and few months dating my best friend. He makes me smile on my hardest days and he cheers me on in whatever I do. I have found my person and I’ve compiled a list of the top 10 signs I saw when I realized he was the one.

1. You can be completely yourself around them.

The type of relationship that you want to be in has a judgment-free zone. The person that is made for you will not pick apart your flaws, but they’ll embrace all of your quirks. After all, that’s what makes you YOU! And they love the real you.

2. They make you happy.

This probably seems like a “duh” thing, but let’s be real. All of us have dated someone that kinda made us happy, kinda made us not so happy. I’m not saying there won’t be issues in your relationship, but when you can have a disagreement and then be laughing together an hour later - that’s when you’ve found them.

3. They treat you with respect.

This is probably another “duh” moment, but when you have that respect, you’ll get what I mean. This person respects you enough to communicate honestly and openly. They respect you enough to build you up, not tear you down. They respect you enough to let you know when you’re wrong, but they’ll do it in a loving way. Basically, everything that this person does is with you in mind, because they love and care about you, but they also respect you. And because they respect you, they will be mindful of how their decisions affect you.

4. They are excited about your success.

Who doesn’t love to have someone super excited with them about their goals and accomplishments? Your person will be your biggest fan! After all, your success makes you happy, and when you’re happy, they’re happy.

5. They get real with you when they need to.

While it may not be our favorite thing to admit, sometimes we are wrong. We mess up, we can hurt people’s feelings, and when we do mess up, our S.O. is the first one to let us know, but in a loving way. Your person is going to know your “love language”, therefore they are going to know the best way to communicate with you. Sometimes someone has to tell us when we’re being the worst, and I don’t know about you, but I’d prefer that person to be someone that loves me.

6. You don’t always have to be doing something to have fun.

You are completely fine with just hanging out. Being with that person is enough for you.

7. You can’t imagine being with anyone else.

Your person fills every part of your life that you need them to and then some. They are your better half and you cannot imagine sharing all of your life experiences with anyone but them.

8. You make each other want to be better people.

You’re your own dream team. You hype them up to be their best and they do the same for you.

9. You would do anything for them and they would do the same.

When you’ve found your person, no task is too great. And neither of you ever expect anything in return. It’s just a given that you are there for each other 100% of the time.

10. You love them more and more every single day.

Yes, it sounds SOOO corny, but trust me, it’s so true. When you’ve found the one, your life will never be the same. You never know how much you can love someone until you’ve found them, and you often wonder how you’ve gone this long without them.

Cover Image Credit: Anna Lewis

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15 Tips For Interacting With Guys According To "Hamilton"

Be willing to wait for it.

So, here's the deal: I've been reflecting on Valentine's Day this past week, and I've come to a conclusion. Interacting with the opposite gender is really freaking hard.

No, really. Most guys I talk to will tell me that they're really simple creatures. And they are, I'll admit that. But let's face it, they aren't always the most straightforward creatures in their simplicity. So, sometimes us girls are left to decipher our interactions with them. And it gets real confusing, real fast.

So, on the topic of conversation, you know who liked to talk a lot?

Alexander Hamilton.

You know who had tons of women falling all over him?

Alexander Hamilton.

Let's let him and his compatriots tell the tale.

1. First of all, never assume someone is into you.

It is a fair possibility you're just reading too much into it.

2. Also, remember even if they are, being nice is worth it in the long run.

If I'm being perfectly honest, this is still something I'm working on. Don't lead them down the garden path, but seriously, don't be a jerk, either.

3. Be careful about who you put in the friend zone.

Because they could show up later when you've made a complete fool of yourself and rub it in your face. Rather like King George.

Kidding. Just don't rule out someone who's actually awesome for shallow reasons.

4. If you have friend zoned someone, make sure it's for a good reason.

Like, perchance, the fact that you're in love with their sister. That's a good reason.

5. Don't be afraid to talk to the dudes you like.

Seriously, it's not as difficult as it looks. Just making conversation.

6. If you're not sure whether someone you're interested shares the interest, just ask.

Yes. This is what it will feel like.

7. It's not the end of the world if they don't.

You probably deserve better. Rather like Eliza.

(But newsflash: You're not perfect, either. If you deserve better, the overall likelihood is that so do they.)

8. Unless they were stringing you along.

Write them a very strongly worded letter or let a friend slap them. Get you an Angelica, kid.

9. Talk to someone older than you about guys.

The overall likelihood is this chick is going to have more experience than you, and hopefully will be wiser for it.

10. Remember, if someone's being a creeper, your girls have your back.

You see these guys? Squad goals. Like you and your ladies.

11. Just be clear in your communication.

Actually, if you take Burr literally, their reaction will be EXACTLY like Hamilton's. So actually, do talk. Tell them or have a friend tell them you're uncomfortable. However, if they don't get it...

12. Try taking it to a higher power.

As my roommate asked the other day, "Wait, God?"

Yes, He would be beneficial. I highly recommend that. But what I'm referring to in this particular instance is someone who has direct (earthly) authority over your particular stalker. They'll probably be able to do something. And if this fails...

13. Carry pepper spray.

This GIF does not relate at all. I just guarantee you that Hamilton and Jefferson carry pepper spray in case the other one pushes them too far.

And probably Daveed Diggs and Lin-Manuel Miranda to fend off the adoring, obsessive fanpeoples.

14. Appreciate the male friendships you have.

Some of my favorite people are my brother friends. Or my dad friend. Or my uncle friend. Or just plain guys. They're pretty great.

15. And honestly, when it comes to finding that elusive "One"...

Y'all should be, too.

Cover Image Credit: YouTube

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