Deciding What To Do With Your Life After College Graduation | The Odyssey Online
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Student Life

If You Don't Have An Immediate Plan After College, You Are A Pathetic Loser Who Will Never Be Successful In Life

It's so sad, but so true.

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If You Don't Have An Immediate Plan After College, You Are A Pathetic Loser Who Will Never Be Successful In Life

Everyone, it's all true. Your worst fears are about to be realized. Everything that every pessimistic jerk has told you for the past four years is actually a completely true fact. You didn't want to believe these things, but now you have no choice. Yep, it's all true. If you graduate college without a clearly laid out plan as to where your life will take you, then you are a sad, pathetic loser who will never amount to anything for as long as you live.

I know, I know. It may seem hard to take in, but now is the time to breathe it all in and come to the realization that unless your life is planned out perfectly from moment to moment for years and years after you graduate, then you have just wasted the past four years that you spent in college.

After all, college is by no means a time to explore your interests and expand your mind. Heck no, college is a time to gain the skills necessary for becoming a mindless drone in the corporate world. If you don't have some "real world" job lined up immediately after graduation, then congratulations on being a gigantic waste of space.

All of those obnoxious people telling you this all along were absolutely right, even if you would rather not admit it. Forget about enjoying the last days of your college career. Forget about the fact that even after you graduate, you still have the rest of your life to figure out exactly who you want to be and what you want to do. Stop thinking pointless thoughts, such as the idea that it's okay to not have a complete and definite post-graduation plan.$

You either have your life completely figured out after graduation, or you don't. But if you don't, then you never will. It's as simple as that. Don't listen to the people who will try and tell you that you're still young and you still have all the time in the world to forge your own path and try to make something of yourself. Don't listen to the people who tell you that having a college degree is a huge accomplishment in itself, no matter what the degree is in.

If they tell you that the degree will pay off eventually even if you don't have definite post-graduation plans, stop listening to them immediately. If you have any moment of post-college uncertainty, then make no mistake, your life is already over. Remember, the person that you are immediately after you graduate is the same person that you will be for the rest of your life. You have no more opportunities to change. College is your last chance to ever grow as a person, so if you are not the person that you were always meant to be as soon as you graduate, then sorry, but you're completely out of luck.

If you intend to graduate soon, be prepared. Your life will soon begin, for better or for worse. The world is a scary, horrible place that will you eat you alive, chew you up for a while, and then spit you back out, or at least whatever is left of you at that point. So you know, at least we all have that to one day look forward to.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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