This is an open letter to every single person that has felt victimized by the church.
I'm not expecting some extraordinary response to this because I know that this letter is a scandal. No one wants to talk about this, no one wants to hear it, no one wants to address the painful reality that the church is a walking contradiction to all that Christianity is supposed to stand for, and in that, the church is sending people to hell in its victimizations.
This is for the one that has been told they're beyond saving and they aren't good enough for church. The one that was told they'll never amount to anything for God. The one that let the church tell them they have to "clean up" before God could accept them and that sin is way too big for Him. The one that has sunk in their church pew time and time again, wishing they would've stayed home. The one that got sent home to change because you're apparently unacceptable to God if you aren't dressed in a skirt below your knees (as if we could ever reach that marker of acceptance), and in that, men's wondering eyes are absolutely our fault. The one that refuses to put God in a box. This is for the one that got called out, shamed and ridiculed in ways that still haunt them to this very day — the one that swore they'd never go back because if that's what Christianity is all about, they don't want it.
First, it's OK to be hurt. I'd even argue that in this case, it's OK to be offended. We are just humans, but that is not a justification for what has been done to you. We are sinful by nature, so no matter how hard we try, that will never change. But, dear one, that is not a justification for one to run you away from church, and God even. It is OK to admit that it was wrong because it truly was. So scream, cry, eat a gallon of ice cream (it'll make you feel better), know that it is OK to be hurt.
Second, recognize that incorrect depictions of Christ do not define Him. The church is intended to absolutely picture Christ and His love, and that just wasn't done. But do not take those wrong depictions to your own personal presentation of Christ, letting bitterness build up, molding negative presumptions about Him in return. He is not anything that the church wrongly displays. He is not hate and ridicule. He is not shame or seclusion. He is love — the covering that breaks through every inch of that hurt.
Third, their actions do not dictate your worth. If I could portray one truth to you in this, this would be the one. Take this one home. You can take it to the bank and cash it even because we can believe what He said to be true, forever. They do not and will not ever dictate your worth. You are His precious, beloved work of art. You are set apart and deeply cherished. You are a chosen generation and a royal priesthood. And that is not wavered by what has been said and done to you. Absolutely believe that.
Fourth, take it to Jesus. I'm not asking you to stay somewhere where you feel humiliated, uncomfortable and unappreciated. God will not even ask that of you. I'm saying tell Him about it — pour your heart out, no matter how long it takes. He wants to hear it. Every word, even. He's a good, good Father that will work it all out to your good and His glory.
I know it hurts. But He is not the author of that hurt, so don't punish the One that desires to give you the healing that you so desire.
Won't you let Him?
Love,
A fellow victim
