Life is complicated. It has a lot of twists and turns. It has a lot of ups and downs. What you think your life is going to be, is not what your life actually turns into most days. The day you learn to accept this truth is the day you stop fighting a battle you were not supposed to fight in the first place.
I am still fighting that particular battle. I easily become frustrated when how I thought the day should go is not matching up with how the day is actually going. I need God's grace to be with me on those days. I need Him to help me become long suffering, instead of short sighted and impatient, which is my habit most of the time. I tend to ask God why bad things are happening, instead of believing in His goodness.
There are some days when my dreams line up with reality and I feel like I have the world in my hands. On those days it's very easy to forget the one who holds me. It is because of Him that I am able to see my dreams come to fruition the way they sometimes do. It is during those days that I need to focus clearly on who has blessed me with these gifts and opportunities. It is so easy in those moments for me to think I did it all by myself when that isn’t true in the slightest. I need God more on my “together” days than I do on my bad days in some ways.
The rarest days of all are the days where my dreams are not coming true but I am still in a place of peace. I love those days, even more than the days where everything comes together perfectly. Those days feed my soul because they are a rare gift. That peace does not come from my circumstances. It does not come from me or the people around me. It comes straight God. It is not anything I have done.
Peace is a gift that we don't have to earn. It's not for sale. It's not something we have to work for. All we have to do is ask. I wish I asked for peace more. Every time I feel overwhelmed, I wish I would stop and ask for peace. But I don’t and every time I don’t, I miss out on knowing God just a little bit better than I did before.
