An open letter to my 5th grade teacher who held me back,
You’re an idiot. And I hope you realize that.
Because there are things you didn’t know about the girl that walked into your classroom and failed math.
The first thing, my brother did the project you assigned over winter break. He had to look up how to do it on the internet. He’s 4 years older than me. He gave it to me as a Christmas present.
The second thing, my uncle had killed himself 2 months before I stepped into the classroom. The next thing I experienced was someone telling me I wasn’t good enough.
The third thing, I kept a bag outside of my door for when I was going to run away.
Fourth thing, you were the reason I got my first therapist.
Some things you should know about now:
4 months after you held me back in math, I went in early every morning to get back into advanced math. And I did. And I passed with an A.
Every single math class I took in high school was honors except for one.
I got into the first group for my math placement test into college.
You were the first example I had of someone not rooting for me. Someone that would ‘lose’ assignments so I would have to redo them if I wanted to get credit for them. You were the reason I cried looking at a math book, and the reason I still hate math.
But, you taught me an important lesson.
It doesn’t matter how hard you work, sometimes you just don’t get what you want. When that happens, you work harder, and make the people deny you regret their choice.
So, I worked harder than you ever thought I could. I worked at a preschool 30 hours a week my senior year, graduated Cum Laude, and now go to a college in New York.
I work harder than you can imagine, being the worst teacher I’ve ever had in my years of education.
You still teach at the same school. I live 10 hours away from you, laughing at you from the top of South Hill, laughing my ass off, while working harder, and being better than you could ever imagine.
I’ll admit, you lit a fire under my ass. Not because I was inspired, but because I wanted to make you burn. I wanted to show you I am more than you gave me credit for.
And 8 years later I still think about it. Ridiculous? Yeah. A waste of my time? Probably.
But every time I think about quitting I imagine your fake platinum hair and fake orange skin. And with that motivation, I passed two Anatomy exams, a class I was never actually registered in.
So thank you, for pushing me to succeed. Because I succeed just to spite you. I succeed because you thought I wouldn’t. You thought I couldn’t.
I succeeded the second I walked out of your classroom, you failed the second you walked in.
Sincerely,
A little blonde 10-year-old turned into the most determined 18-year-old you’ll ever meet.
P.S. thanks for accepting my friend request on Facebook.
