I used to hate Taylor Swift. I thought her songs were annoying and never really seemed to grasp what life meant. They were all just some predictable stories about love, and the failure of that love, and then how she supposedly became a better person from it all. Well, I don't think that way anymore. Now, it is quite the opposite; I think a person has to go through heartbreak in order to understand Taylor Swift's songs. And, currently, I think that she has become a voice of our generation in the face of hook-up culture. But this letter is not addressed to Taylor. In fact, it might as well be addressed to all of those boys that made me listen to her and finally understand what she singing about.

The other day a notification came up from my Timehop app (yes, that annoying app with tons of notifications telling you that it is your last chance to view what happened several years ago, when you still have plenty of hours your day to view it). Wanting to get rid of the notification, I opened it. I found a tweet of mine that was related to how I was feeling at the time.

Just about a year ago, the beginning of the heartbreak roller coaster began. I had recently told a guy that I began to have feelings for him (basically, a big no no in today's hook-up culture ways, where the one with the less amount of power or emotional interest wins). Now, I have dated other guys before and said those three little words, but saying that I started to like this guy was a big jump for me. He had already said it to me, so why was I so hesitant to do the same? Perhaps, it was the realization that I was finally started to like someone after such toxic past relationships, or maybe it was the notion that I was still scared of letting someone into my life. But, no matter what the reason was behind my confession, all I know is that I was brave. So, I said that I had feelings for him, the night continued on being just fine, and I went home the next afternoon. We texted and talked about random stuff for the next few days and then (shocker!) nothing. And, it ended with me sending one-sided texts to him with no answer in return. Let the downward spiral begin!

Now, of course, this wasn't my first time dealing with guys like this, who after sometime of romantic courting, where the road ahead looks so nice while filled with lovey-dovey flowers and sunshine leading to a relationship, just blatantly stop with no reason why. They begin to ignore you, or, in other words, ghost you. Perhaps, it might come off to them as the easy way out, a way for them not to break the girl's heart. Oh hell no! Rather, we would like some kind of closure. If you are not interested in us anymore, cool, just tell us. That is far better than letting our minds wander and think, "Oh, if i did this differently, would he still like me?" We constantly replay over and over again in our minds every action, conversation, and time we ever spent with you, aka the heartbreak ensues.

But, after this past year filled with heartbreak and striving to figure out what just happened, I realized something: I grew up. And, I am moving on with my life. It has taken me a lot longer than I had ever anticipated or like to admit, but there is sunshine over that daunting hill. Now, don't think that there comes a time in my life where I am not doing anything important. Maybe I am in the shower just shampooing my hair, or maybe I am walking home from class and something crosses my path and I think about those ghosting guys. I think about the so-called relationship that we had at the time. It was fun; we both enjoyed ourselves. But, then the next thought that comes across my mind is the one of their mistake. I recognize the memories we had, but I'm done carrying them around having them affect my everyday life. I can go on with my life knowing that I did nothing wrong.

But, you, however, have to walk around with the realization that you broke someone's heart. And, then it will happen to you. Just as in the same scenario where you are not doing anything really important in your life, like you're in the shower, something will spark a memory of me. You will remember the fun time we had and inevitably want that back. Guys, you will realize that maybe I was the one and that you should have ended up testing those relationship waters with. Perhaps I was the girl who was suppose to be your other half, but you were to focused on something else at the time: your ego. But the fact is that you will never know. That chance is gone.

So, while time has passed and I am sure that I have changed just as much as you have changed in the past year, we can look back on our time and think differently upon it. For you, it might be a chapter of a book that you stopped writing and want to go back to, but know that chapter will only be one thing: unfinished. But, for me, it will me a chapter of my life's book that is closed. It will be one that I will occasionally read from time to time, but all with the notion of a learning experience; it made me realize that there are some characteristics I don't want to see in the man I eventually end up with years from now. I don't want to live the rest of my life out with a guy who is too focused on his reputation and social life to put them above me by using the action of ignoring me to better his image.

Guys who ignored me, you are never going to read this. And, quite frankly, I am okay with that. I don't really care all that much. But, I am going to read this. And, I will read it over and over again. I will read it on those nights where I feel vulnerable, those nights where I feel like everything is going to fall apart. At the beginning, I might have some joyous memory of us come flutter around my mind, but by the end of reading this letter, I will only be reminded by one thing: the promise I have made to myself. I have taken the journey of me, one of self-discovery. I will not let your memory dictate my life any longer. A wise former roommate of mine said it best. "Time doesn't aid in the healing process; It teaches you how to ignore. It teaches you how to grow up." Therefore, goodbye, memories of d-bag guys who didn't truly care about me! And, hello to the real me!

So, no longer will those teardrops drop on my guitar, instead I am going to shake them off because I am finally clean. Okay, that is enough Taylor Swift for one sentence! And, so naturally, now let's transition into the words of Jay Z, I am onto the next one!