Dear Non-Singles (because being in a relationship isn't the only way not to be single anymore) and worried Singles,
As single people of the twenty-first century, we understand you feel it is a right of passage to "share" your wealth of knowledge with us, or words of encouragement so we don't lose faith, but we're good. I repeat: WE'RE GOOD.
We know you've been around the block a few times and know how being single goes but so have we and then some because we didn't stop going. We love that you want to see us happy with someone like you, and we're totally jazzed you found someone that does that for you. But, always a but, who's to say we're not happy the way we are just being on our own?
As someone who is very comfortably single and most likely will be for a while, being in a relationship just isn't in the plan right now; not that I haven't considered it because believe me I have many times. And it isn't that I'm unable to find someone, I've found plenty of guys that I could be in a relationship with but for many of us it's more than just finding someone to call my significant other, so much more. Just like you guys we need to find someone who gets us, that sees just how great we are like you do. I've come to find once you're in a relationship these blinder go on and any other single must be perfect this other single person.
This isn't the case for all, thankfully not for many of my friends (thank god), but I've witnessed taken friends setting up their single friends on blind dates with someone their polar-opposite just because they were decently attractive and single. The sentiment is nice but maybe let us take the reins back. What many have yet to grasp is that before getting into a relationship you have to date and get to know each other, which takes time and a certain amount of patiences, and if you're not willing to make the effort or take that time you really shouldn't be getting involved with someone anyway.
Relationships mean making a space in your life for another human being to become a priority in your everyday life, not the main priority mind you, but a priority nevertheless. I know I'm nowhere ready to make anyone but myself a priority so I'm not even remotely interested in making someone else one. It just wouldn't be fair to either of us to pretend.
Singles everywhere are feeling the pressure to be with someone and it's mostly a pressure we put on ourselves, but it's a pressure we shouldn't worry about it. Stop looking at all these people in your life and in the media and live your life. Don't compare your experience to anyone who isn't you because we're all at different places on this journey. Spend your time wisely, even if it's just by yourself.
Sincerely,
The Perpetually and Happily Single
