Open Letter To Disabled Young Adults Who Have Lost a Friend Because They Can't "Follow Them"
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Open Letter To Disabled Young Adults Who Have Lost a Friend Because They Can't "Follow Them"

Nemo Nisi Mors?

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Open Letter To Disabled Young Adults Who Have Lost a Friend Because They Can't "Follow Them"
Yarianna Ledger

As life goes on, it is normal to grow apart from old friends, to get involved with activities that will take upon your free time and is just a matter of years to realize that your life has turned completely around of who you used to be.

To live with a disability sometimes means that the life pace can seems to go slower than the rest of people. When you’re young and during the years of self-developing, you meet people that will stay at your side, will help you in whatever they can and will become your friends. School and college years end, and your friends will continue with their roads. It's not their fault that you cannot follow them because you simply don’t have the abilities to do it. The following years, the frustration of seeing the persons (who someday out of ignorance, promise you to stay at your side) doing their life, without you are hard and sad. To look at their Facebook account turns into an unbearable addiction that would destroy your faith in friendship. You will see them visit the world you were supposed to meet together, sometimes they get married and have kids, while you are still sitting in front of your computer, drinking coffee and wondering who will help you get in bed that night.

I know this happens, but only you are responsible for getting out of your comfort zone and build a life. If life has shown me something, it's that opportunities will never knock at your door if you don’t go and grab them. A “normal” life, as the one your friends are having, can seem to take forever. But not because sometimes it takes longer, it means it will never come. To hold back onto memories and persons who no longer care about you, is the easiest way of destroying the so needed self-esteem. YOU are the only person who will always stick around, and at some point it’s going to be enough of self-pity and of dreaming of what could have been if your friends would have stuck around with you.

Friends come and go; I promise you that you will find more people in life, at your work place, at the shopping mall, or even in a chat! That will know you and will value who you are. You will make great friends who will stay, you will find love, you will become a crazy scientist living with 13 cats at a penthouse in New Orleans... (or whatever your dreams are) and discover the world is as you were promised once.

That friend who left you and never looked back will also continue with his/her life. Maybe and hopefully he will have a happy life, full of new friends; he will be fine and so will you. Holding on the past is trying to live experiences already passed and closing the door for new ones to come. There is no point to holding a grudge against someone you once loved, a person who contributed in many laughs of your youth. And never, ever, blame your disability for it. Please understand that not being able to do something doesn’t mean you can’t do anything. Find what you like and a way to do it. Those ways might end up not being as quick and traditional as others, but what you can obtain will be absolutely thrilling and gratifying.

You will learn not to compare yourself to your old friends and understand that "different" is not as bad as it can seem to hurt at some points in life. Keep your head up, your mind clean and your heart open… go out and triumph.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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