Dear anyone who is feeling like someone is missing this season,
When I think of the holidays, I think of cold weather, presents, classic movies, friends and family to watch them with, hot chocolate, stuffing yourself with homemade food until you can't walk, family bonding, and so many other fun things - except it isn't always like that. Sometimes the holidays can be sad because someone who you feel like should be there isn't. Whether this person just couldn't make it to the festivities this year, they are no longer a part of your life, or have moved on from this life entirely - whether it is your first holiday without them or your twentieth - it can be hard. It is okay to miss them.
If someone simply was unable to attend festivities this year, give them a call and tell them how you miss them because odds are they miss you too. It is alright to miss them, but don't let it ruin your holiday. Enjoy the time you have with the friends and family who are able to attend.
This will be my eighth Christmas without my dad and my seventh without my grandparents and while it has gotten easier it doesn't go unnoticed. This is going to sound cheesy, but you have to try to see the upside of the situation. When I am feeling upset, I think of the "at leasts." For example, at least I have my mom, stepdad, and siblings to spend the holidays with, at least I have become so close to them because of hardships we have faced. It is hard to see things as positive when you're missing a loved one, so that is why I fall back on my "at leasts." Whoever you are missing would also probably not want you to have a bad holiday because of them, they would want you to enjoy it.
If you have not experienced this sort of loss and someone has simply left your life, like an ex significant other, or a friend who it didn't quite work out with, it is okay to miss them too. Just remember that while it is okay to miss them and or wish them happy holidays, they are probably no longer in your life for a reason. We all have chapters in our lives and some people are not meant to be in every chapter, and some not meant to make it to the end of our story. While this is a hard truth, it is something we must accept.
One very important thing to remember is that the holidays are not meant to make you feel like crap; they are supposed to make you feel warm and cozy inside. There's something in the air that is inherently happy, let it take you over. When you find yourself being taken over by this happiness, don't fight it, it's okay to be happy even though this person isn't there with you. It is also okay not to be happy - all I'm saying is don't fight the happiness if you feel it coming. Missing people is natural, but dwelling isn't. So don't dwell this holiday season, acknowledge your feelings then let yourself see the positives, or the "at leasts," and enjoy this season as much as possible.
