An Open Letter To 'The One' (For Right Now)

An Open Letter To 'The One' (For Right Now)

In my early 20s I've learned relationships don't take a backseat to loving myself.

As little girls, we are taught almost from conception that true love has great importance (thanks, Walt Disney). What we don’t realize, however, is that true love comes in various forms. A true love can be a mother touching the hand of her child for the first time, a first kiss, a best friendship, and, most important yet most forgotten, the love of oneself. Each true love helps mature us into the best versions of ourselves; we just have to look a little closer to see it that way.

My first kiss was nothing short of awkward. At age 15 in the Kenwood Towne Center mall, a cut lip and spinach from his braces were just a few of the battle wounds from the moment. I was disappointed and let down because "The Princess Diaries" told me my first kiss should be magical and “foot popping.” However, it became a moment of true love nonetheless.

We didn’t speak much afterwards, but my first kiss taught me to be more comfortable in myself. The cut on the lip healed, the spinach was brushed away, and the nervousness faded. It may not have been my Prince Charming moment, but I found true love in it.

My first boyfriend lasted a total of three whole weeks. Not to mention, I broke up with him on Valentine’s Day. My first time at the movies on a double date after being dropped off by my mother was scandalous and "grown up." A “relationship” kept alive through the words behind a cell phone screen may have been one of the furthest things from romance, but it taught me how to communicate. There are television marathons that last longer than my very first relationship, but without it, I would still be stuck behind my cell phone barely able to say hello to anyone from the opposite sex.

The first time a boy broke my heart, I didn’t think I would be able to recover. I was led on and felt physical pain. "Pretty Little Liars" told me it would hurt (when Spencer thought Toby was dead), but I could never have imagined the pain until I felt it firsthand. The dewy but warm hand interlaced through mine echoed in my memory, and I wanted it to just stop. However, I learned that if a boy did not want to love me in return for all of my ferociousness, then it truly was his loss. Without pain, you never truly know happiness.

Now, I have learned a lot from past true loves such as boys, friendships, career paths, and experiences. A friend may be the best thing for you at the time, but leaves you with no one to turn to when you need them most. A boy may seem like the Prince Eric who saves you when you finally can stand on two feet, but falls for the Ursula instead. At the end of the day, you truly only have yourself, and nearing 21, that’s okay with me.

I am a strong woman learning from each form of true love. I have my own career goals, personal expectations, and expectations for/if I decide to get married one day. For now, I am loving myself first and foremost, and becoming the best version of me so I am not hindered by any unopened opportunities. After all, if you want a great relationship love, you can only gain it by first seeing your own worth.


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It's Time To Thank Your First Roommate

Not the horror story kind of roommate, but the one that was truly awesome.

Nostalgic feelings have recently caused me to reflect back on my freshman year of college. No other year of my life has been filled with more ups and downs, and highs and lows, than freshman year. Throughout all of the madness, one factor remained constant: my roommate. It is time to thank her for everything. These are only a few of the many reasons to do so, and this goes for roommates everywhere.

You have been through all the college "firsts" together.

If you think about it, your roommate was there through all of your first college experiences. The first day of orientation, wishing you luck on the first days of classes, the first night out, etc. That is something that can never be changed. You will always look back and think, "I remember my first day of college with ____."

You were even each other's first real college friend.

You were even each other's first real college friend.

Months before move-in day, you were already planning out what freshman year would be like. Whether you previously knew each other, met on Facebook, or arranged to meet in person before making any decisions, you made your first real college friend during that process.

SEE ALSO: 18 Signs You're A Little Too Comfortable With Your Best Friends

The transition from high school to college is not easy, but somehow you made it out on the other side.

It is no secret that transitioning from high school to college is difficult. No matter how excited you were to get away from home, reality hit at some point. Although some people are better at adjusting than others, at the times when you were not, your roommate was there to listen. You helped each other out, and made it through together.

Late night talks were never more real.

Remember the first week when we stayed up talking until 2:00 a.m. every night? Late night talks will never be more real than they were freshman year. There was so much to plan for, figure out, and hope for. Your roommate talked, listened, laughed, and cried right there with you until one of you stopped responding because sleep took over.

You saw each other at your absolute lowest.

It was difficult being away from home. It hurt watching relationships end and losing touch with your hometown friends. It was stressful trying to get in the swing of college level classes. Despite all of the above, your roommate saw, listened, and strengthened you.

...but you also saw each other during your highest highs.

After seeing each other during the lows, seeing each other during the highs was such a great feeling. Getting involved on campus, making new friends, and succeeding in classes are only a few of the many ways you have watched each other grow.

There was so much time to bond before the stresses of college would later take over.

Freshman year was not "easy," but looking back on it, it was more manageable than you thought at the time. College only gets busier the more the years go on, which means less free time. Freshman year you went to lunch, dinner, the gym, class, events, and everything else possible together. You had the chance to be each other's go-to before it got tough.

No matter what, you always bounced back to being inseparable.

Phases of not talking or seeing each other because of business and stress would come and go. Even though you physically grew apart, you did not grow apart as friends. When one of you was in a funk, as soon as it was over, you bounced right back. You and your freshman roommate were inseparable.

The "remember that one time, freshman year..." stories never end.

Looking back on freshman year together is one of my favorite times. There are so many stories you have made, which at the time seemed so small, that bring the biggest laughs today. You will always have those stories to share together.

SEE ALSO: 15 Things You Say To Your Roommates Before Going Out

The unspoken rule that no matter how far apart you grow, you are always there for each other.

It is sad to look back and realize everything that has changed since your freshman year days. You started college with a clean slate, and all you really had was each other. Even though you went separate ways, there is an unspoken rule that you are still always there for each other.

Your old dorm room is now filled with two freshmen trying to make it through their first year. They will never know all the memories that you made in that room, and how it used to be your home. You can only hope that they will have the relationship you had together to reflect on in the years to come.

Cover Image Credit: Katie Ward

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Hannah B. Named The Next Bachelorette: Get Excited!!

Roll Tide.


On the season finale of the hit reality TV show 'The Bachelor' Chris Harrison announced the new Bachelorette to be Hannah Brown, affectionately referred to as "Hannah Beast." Hannah made it far in Colton's season of the Bachelor, but hit some bumps along the way. She was involved in serious drama with costar and fellow pageant competitor Caelynn. Not only is Hannah B. known for drama and tears, she is also known for her awkward and often uncomfortable behavior around the cameras. And let's not forget the most awkward first date and toast of all time...Roll Tide!

Despite her awkward and quirky personality, I think the Alabama native is truly a sweetheart. She cannot be judged based on the controversy that took place between her and Caelynn because no one knows the full truth of the story. In my opinion, no one was completely innocent in their "cat fight" but the way in which each girl handled themselves in the resolution of this drama was mature and, quite frankly, impressive. I think Hannah B's season will be full of more tears and could potentially be very uncomfortable to watch at some moments, but at the end of the say, Hannah B. deserves to find love just like any other 'Bachelor' hopeful. It will definitely be an interesting season to watch, so get excited!!

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