On The White Savages' Entertainment
Politics and Activism

On The White Savages' Entertainment

A letter to savage rituals of the abhorrent culture you have sent me to investigate.

On The White Savages' Entertainment

As a white man the concept of racism has always held my attention, not as one who has suffered its harsh lash, but as a member of a race that has so often been the oppressor throughout history. I have always had the desire to address the concept of racism and to understand how it occurs in the human mind.

Over time, I have realized that a large portion of racism comes from how Caucasians tend to view “inferior” cultures. We as a culture and a people tend to judge those who are technologically inferior as being more primitive and “tribal” than they actually are. I have also realized that many Caucasians simply do not realize the basic assumptions they have made of these people or how they are wrong. In truth, the very concept of “civilization” places massive value on certain arbitrary cultural values and uses these values to place certain people groups above others.

In order to help illustrate the habitual racism that many unthinkingly employ, I have invented a man named Theocrates. Theocrates is a fictional ambassador from the technologically advanced nation of Atlantis. As an ambassador, Theocrates will be writing to his king about the savage nature of modern Americans, a people who are technologically and culturally inferior to the Atlanteans. And with this introduction I will begin his letter.

“To my most gracious King,

I am writing to you concerning the truly savage rituals of the abhorrent culture you have sent me to investigate. I have recently witnessed a scene of such exotic savagery that I feel I must bring it to your attention.

Several days ago, I asked my host to show me a form of the entertainment that the common American savage might indulge himself in. After a few seconds he declared that he knew just the thing I might be interested in. We got into his vehicle some time later and presently we arrived at a large coliseum. This was the point where things began to go downhill. Outside the coliseum many people were gathered. To my horror I saw that many were cooking food over open fires out in the open air. As far as I could tell there was not a single truly sophisticated oven or stove in sight. When I asked my guide why these people would prepare their food in such an abysmal fashion, he gave me the kind of answer that only a savage American could produce. They did so for fun.

After we had made our way through the hordes encamped outside the coliseum we made our way inside. There I saw that the building was surrounding a great, flat, field. This field was covered with what could only have been what the Americans considered to be magical runes and symbols (this is of course primitive and unscientific nonsense). At either end of the field a great tribal idol had been erected. Each idol had both arms outstretched, and each was painted yellow in the semblance of gold (I highly doubt that any American could ever afford that much real gold).

As I looked, I saw several men on the field who could only have been priests. I could tell this because they were dressed in black and white costumes that seemed highly ceremonial and clearly denoted their authority above the other figures on the field. Of the other figures there seemed to be several types. The most notable groups were the two teams of players. As I looked I saw that these men wore heavy armor, the purpose of which I would realize in a moment. Strangely, they were all arrayed identically with the only main difference being the fact that each team had an arbitrarily different set of colors in their uniforms.

There were also two groups of scantily clad women on the side lines who’s only purpose seemed to be to whip the crowd into a fervor.

It was at this point that I realized, most of the crowd had come wearing the colors of one of the teams. From this I guessed that each set of colors represented a different tribe. Each team was obviously meant to play for the honor of its tribe, and the black and white priests were obviously meant to mediate between the two. As for the women, I can only assume they were each team’s concubines come to urge their men onward (as I have said, the Americans are savages).

Having discerned the meaning of the savages’ symbolism, I now wondered what type of savage sport would be played. I must tell you, my king, that for all my experience with the American savages I could not have ever prepared myself for the barbarity that I witnessed that day.

All I know for sure is that one of the priests introduced a small object to one of the teams, and within moments they were at each other’s throats. I have never in my life seen such a display of violence. Each team charged headlong at its rival as the crowds cheered in admiration. The barbarity grew evermore ridiculous as one of the players managed to move the object (I was later told that it was a ball) to the feet of one of the idols. There I saw, to my astonishment, that the player performed some form of tribal dance, this was no doubt meant to honor the idol and his tribe.

At this point I began to turn away from the blood-bath below. It was also at this point that my host offered me some of the native food. I asked what it was called and he told me it was called a ‘Hot dog’. I took a bite and for a moment I found it pleasant. I then asked as to the contents of the dish and upon hearing the answer I lost all appetite.

This is all I have to say about the sorry state of this primitive culture’s entertainment. I will continue to search for whatever semblance of sophistication they may have in other areas, but until I send my next letter I have nothing else to speak of.

Your servant Theocrates.”

And with that I conclude the first Letter to Atlantis. I may write more in the future but until then, best wishes.

J.R. Woodwright

P.S. Tyler T. you still need to get back to me about editing my novella.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

119 People Reveal How The Pandemic Has Affected Their Love Lives, And Honestly... Relatable

"I haven't been able to get out of the 'talking phase' with anyone."

The reality is, there's no part of life the pandemic hasn't affected. Whether it's your work life, your home life, your social life, or your love life, coronavirus (COVID-19) is wreaking havoc on just about everything — not to mention people's health.

When it comes to romance, in particular, people are all handling things differently and there's no "right way" of making it through, regardless of your relationship status (single, taken, married, divorced, you name it). So, some of Swoon's creators sought out to hear from various individuals on how exactly their love lives have been affected since quarantine began.

Keep Reading... Show less

Megan Thee Stallion and Cardi B just dropped the hottest summer single yet. It's called "WAP" and we're going to get into all the intoxicating lyrics.

This song empowers females and their sexuality. These women put the ridiculous music industry female beef to bed, and I mean tucked away in a coma.

Keep Reading... Show less

How To Write Down The Holy Grail Recipe Everyone Begs You To Make

Because everyone has a signature cocktail, cake, or pasta they bring to every potluck.


From back when I used to bring my mom's classic white chocolate chip cookies to preschool on my birthday to now stirring up my signature tequila cocktails at every friends' barbecue, I've always had a couple of standby recipes in my culinary rotation.

Keep Reading... Show less

Meet My Cat: Cheshire, The Stray Turned House Cat Who Lives in Michigan

I never considered myself a cat person, but Chess immediately stole my heart.

Madelyn Darbonne

In 2016, a stray cat gave birth to a litter of three grey kittens on my aunt and uncle's property. I had never considered myself to be much of a cat person, but these furballs immediately stole my heart. I got to watch them grow up until they were old enough to leave their mother's side.

Keep Reading... Show less

How To Binge-Watch A TV Show —And Then Write A Review About It

Writing your favorite and least favorite things about a show could not be more fun.

Photo by Mollie Sivaram on Unsplash

Looking for a new show to binge? Stop scrolling through your options and listen.

Sometimes a good show doesn't come down to the genre or the actors involved, it comes down to the fact that it is simply a GOOD show. If any of these things sound appealing to you, you should definitely watch.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

11 Reasons Why Getting A Cat Is The Best Thing You Can Do For Your Mental Health

Cats may mess up your puzzles but they'll always love you unconditionally — as long as you have some catnip, that is.

Scout Guarino

Alright, everyone, it's time to stop spreading the rumor that all cats are mean, aloof, and hate everyone. Like dogs, each cat has its own personality and tendencies. Some like a lot of attention, some like less — each person has to find the right cat for them. As for me, my cats Bienfu and Reptar have seen me at my worst, but they've also helped pull me out of it. They're a constant in my life and they give me the strength to get through the day in spite of my depression, and there's even scientific evidence to support it!

Keep Reading... Show less

I've been bleaching my hair since I was in seventh grade. Yes, you read that correctly, seventh grade. That's nearly 10 years of maintaining a very light shade of blonde that too-often brings about dryness and brittle strands.

Keep Reading... Show less

Chances are if you're here, you're probably interested in writing an open letter. Yay! We're excited to have you.

Of course, not all open letters are created equal. In fact, there's a recipe to writing one for Odyssey that'll get featured on one of our many verticals. When it comes to Swoon specifically (for those new around here, that's our dating and relationships vertical), we receive dozens of open letters each month, many of which are all very similar.

Keep Reading... Show less

With a new phone comes great responsibility: Do not break it! And the best way to do that is with a case. However, picking a case can be a challenge. No need to fret, I am here to help break down some of the best cases for the new iPhone SE 2020. Honestly, I think it's going to be impossible to choose!

Keep Reading... Show less

To some who have been out of the dating world for a while, it can be hard to get back into the swing of things after being single for some time. So, I asked 26 people what they think is important to know before looking for love again, here's what they had to say.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments