I'm A Tomboy Who Learned How To Be 'Girly'
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

I'm A Tomboy Who Learned How To Be 'Girly'

And why being "girly" isn't against feminism, but actually a key component of it.

540
I'm A Tomboy Who Learned How To Be 'Girly'
www.playbuzz.com

I was never really a girly girl.

I had always preferred toy cars to Barbie dolls and getting dirty outside to being clean inside. I was good at sports, which caused me to befriend more boys playing kickball at recess than girls doing each other's hair. Most of my childhood life was defined by the crack of a softball bat hitting an obnoxiously yellow colored ball and the squeak of basketball shoes on the court, or the squish of mud between my fingers or under my bare feet.

I was the definition of a tomboy. When I annoyed my older sister, she would go as far as to say that I actually was a boy. Not a great insult, mind you, but it was damaging and confusing enough for a six year old psyche.

For a long time, I wanted to be like the other girly girls. But eventually, I embraced the tomboy persona placed upon me, thereby rejecting anything and everything that I deemed "girly." I loathed the color pink throughout elementary school, I hated myself for liking Glee in middle school and I scoffed at other girls for wearing makeup to high school every day.

I have just graduated from high school, but it is only recently that I've started to give into my girly side. The past year, I started wearing makeup every day. For prom, I watched YouTube tutorials to learn how to do actual makeup-- and I was surprisingly good at it. I'm starting to learn how to do my hair and tricks to skin care. I'm baking more, and I'm apparently good at that too.

These are all stereotypically female activities-- they don't have to be, but society has long since deemed them as so. So, am I sexist for trying to be "girly" (whatever that means) now that I actually enjoy it?

I don't think so.

To me, a big part of feminism is embracing that which makes you feminine-- traits like empathy and gentleness and compassion. To exhibit those qualities in tasks such as cooking or doing makeup isn't sexist. If anything, it's the opposite.

Feminism has become a concept to many where females are expected to act like men to achieve equality. Essentially, natural womanly qualities can be erased in the search for equality between men and women, but that should not be the case. Men and women should be equal in terms of opportunities and discrimination and education, but they should not be equal in essence. In other words, men and women can be strong, but in entirely different ways, and men and women can be weak, again in different ways. Masculinity and femininity are very different concepts that cannot be equalized, but should both be celebrated, as every person contains qualities from each label.

While there have been many advances in feminism, like how women are now expected to work and to get educated, there are set-backs, like how stay-at-home moms are now often criticized. There is nothing wrong with doing anything stereotypically female if you're a female, and no one should feel like less of a feminist for enjoying those things.

From a person who felt the need to hate girly things for most of her life, I now think it's important to embrace the feminine or masculine qualities that you have. Feminism is not about every woman working and getting educated-- it is about having the choice to do so if you wish. But there is also the choice not to, and that shouldn't be shamed either. To be a stay-at-home mom isn't against feminism, and being a tomboy as a kid doesn't mean you should reject all things feminine.

I have never really been a girly girl, but I'm finally enjoying trying to be one.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Olivia White

"The American flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies from the last breath of each solider who died protecting it."

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Separation Anxiety in Pets

Separation anxiety in pets is a real thing and recognizing the warning signs is important.

164194

Since March, Covid-19 required most of the world to quarantine in their homes. Majority of people ended up working from home for nearly five months. This meant pet owners were constantly with their pets giving them attention, playing with them, letting them out etc. Therefore, when the world slowly started to open up again and pet owners began returning to normal life work schedules away from the home, pet owners noticed a difference in the way their pet acted. Many pets develop separation anxiety especially during this crazy time when majority people were stuck inside barely leaving the house.

Keep Reading... Show less
Robert Bye on Unsplash

I live by New York City and I am so excited for all of the summer adventures.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

The invention of photography

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

345685

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers

1751144

Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Simple Ways To Give Yourself Grace, Especially When Life Gets Hard

Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we are becoming.

1108035
Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

If there's one thing I'm absolutely terrible at, it's giving myself grace. I'm easily my own worst critic in almost everything that I do. I'm a raging perfectionist, and I have unrealistic expectations for myself at times. I can remember simple errors I made years ago, and I still hold on to them. The biggest thing I'm trying to work on is giving myself grace. I've realized that when I don't give myself grace, I miss out on being human. Even more so, I've realized that in order to give grace to others, I need to learn how to give grace to myself, too. So often, we let perfection dominate our lives without even realizing it. I've decided to change that in my own life, and I hope you'll consider doing that, too. Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we're becoming. As you read through these five affirmations and ways to give yourself grace, I hope you'll take them in. Read them. Write them down. Think about them. Most of all, I hope you'll use them to encourage yourself and realize that you are never alone and you always have the power to change your story.

Keep Reading... Show less
Entertainment

Breaking Down The Beginning, Middle, And End of Netflix's Newest 'To All The Boys' Movie

Noah Centineo and Lana Condor are back with the third and final installment of the "To All The Boys I've Loved Before" series

988132
Netflix

Were all teenagers and twenty-somethings bingeing the latest "To All The Boys: Always and Forever" last night with all of their friends on their basement TV? Nope? Just me? Oh, how I doubt that.

I have been excited for this movie ever since I saw the NYC skyline in the trailer that was released earlier this year. I'm a sucker for any movie or TV show that takes place in the Big Apple.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

4 Ways To Own Your Story, Because Every Bit Of It Is Worth Celebrating

I hope that you don't let your current chapter stop you from pursuing the rest of your story.

649898
Photo by Manny Moreno on Unsplash

Every single one of us has a story.

I don't say that to be cliché. I don't say that to give you a false sense of encouragement. I say that to be honest. I say that to be real.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments