It's Okay To Not Have It All Together

It's Okay To Not Have It All Together

Nobody is perfect.

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In this day and age, it's easy to compare yourself to others. With social media in our faces 24/7, you're exposed to everyone else's lives and what they are doing. There is no such thing as privacy anymore. What we put out there is subject for the world to see.

On Instagram, you may see someone from high school you despise studying abroad. On Snapchat, you may see an old friend landing their dream job. On Facebook, you may see your cousin getting engaged. On Twitter, you may see your best friend announce their commitment to a university for sports. While you may be happy for some of these people and their accomplishments, it can be hard to not feel unhappy about yourself. This can cast insecurity and doubt on yourself.

Stop comparing yourself to others. Social media is only a highlight reel, not the whole film. Although people post about good things on social media, they don't expose the truth. The truth is that not everyone's lives are full of sunshines and rainbows all the time. In fact, it is normal for people to have cloudy and stormy days among them.

The point is this: it's okay to not have it all together. If you feel lost or confused, don't worry. These feelings are only temporary. Everyone walks down the path of life at their own pace. If you're too busy comparing yourself to others, you're not going to get to where you want to be.

Whether if you don't know what to do as a career, or you're not always happy-go-lucky, don't put yourself down for it. It's part of being human. You're beautiful no matter what. The best experiences usually stem from the darkest of times. All you need is to light the spark that sets the flame. Don't ever give up despite how challenging it gets.

What's wonderful about this world we live in is that it's okay to make mistakes. You learn from them. No human is perfect after all. We weren't put on this planet to do everything right the first time. Everything happens for a reason. Trust that.

Even the ones you admire most once did not have a grip on what they wanted. They too started from scratch. They too felt uneasy about the future. They too were not sure that they were going to make it. Did they tear themselves apart,and tell themselves they were unworthy? Did they say that they were incapable?

No. They rose up. They fought against the odds. They did everything in their power to move forward. It took them soul searching, hard work, and persistence to get them to where they are today. They took the road less traveled, and it paid off. They built their lives on their own; brick by brick. They took their dreams and made them a reality.

You too can do that. Don't ever make yourself believe that you are not capable of living your best life. Don't ever belittle yourself. Don't be negative to the point that it becomes who you are. Don't be the one standing in your way.

What's stopping you from being okay with not being okay? Not having other people's approval? Not getting a million likes on social media? Not receiving praise, "good job", and "way to go"? This isn't kindergarten where everyone gets a participation trophy. If you feel stuck, and want to be unstuck, only you can change your outcome.

In the meantime, appreciate where you are today. I am sure that you are doing great. You're amazing. You can get through anything. Tough times and uncertainties are what will make you a better person at the end of the day. Those who didn't lift a finger to achieve their goals will soon learn the consequences.

You're doing the best you can. Don't be so hard on yourself. In fact, you may be doing wonderful, and you may not even see it. Life is too short to not appreciate the good with the bad; the dark with the light. It is what brings balance in our lives.

From this day forward, don't complain that you aren't where you want to be. Don't moan that your situation isn't your ideal. Get up, and do whatever it is that will point you in the right direction. Fall in love with yourself before, during, and after the process. Good things don't come to those who wait. Good things come to those who take control of their destiny.

But for now, take a few deep breaths. Relax. You're going to be okay. It's okay to not have it all together.

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If You've Ever Been Called Overly-Emotional Or Too Sensitive, This Is For You

Despite what they have told you, it's a gift.
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Emotional: a word used often nowadays to insult someone for their sensitivity towards a multitude of things.

If you cry happy tears, you're emotional. If you express (even if it's in a healthy way) that something is bothering you, you're sensitive. If your hormones are in a funk and you just happen to be sad one day, you're emotional AND sensitive.

Let me tell you something that goes against everything people have probably ever told you. Being emotional and being sensitive are very, very good things. It's a gift. Your ability to empathize, sympathize, and sensitize yourself to your own situation and to others' situations is a true gift that many people don't possess, therefore many people do not understand.

Never let someone's negativity toward this gift of yours get you down. We are all guilty of bashing something that is unfamiliar to us: something that is different. But take pride in knowing God granted this special gift to you because He believes you will use it to make a difference someday, somehow.

This gift of yours was meant to be utilized. It would not be a part of you if you were not meant to use it. Because of this gift, you will change someone's life someday. You might be the only person that takes a little extra time to listen to someone's struggle when the rest of the world turns their backs.

In a world where a six-figure income is a significant determinant in the career someone pursues, you might be one of the few who decides to donate your time for no income at all. You might be the first friend someone thinks to call when they get good news, simply because they know you will be happy for them. You might be an incredible mother who takes too much time to nurture and raise beautiful children who will one day change the world.

To feel everything with every single part of your being is a truly wonderful thing. You love harder. You smile bigger. You feel more. What a beautiful thing! Could you imagine being the opposite of these things? Insensitive and emotionless?? Both are unhealthy, both aren't nearly as satisfying, and neither will get you anywhere worth going in life.

Imagine how much richer your life is because you love other's so hard. It might mean more heartache, but the reward is always worth the risk. Imagine how much richer your life is because you are overly appreciative of the beauty a simple sunset brings. Imagine how much richer your life is because you can be moved to tears by the lessons of someone else's story.

Embrace every part of who you are and be just that 100%. There will be people who criticize you for the size of your heart. Feel sorry for them. There are people who are dishonest. There are people who are manipulative. There are people who are downright malicious. And the one thing people say to put you down is "you feel too much." Hmm...

Sounds like more of a compliment to me. Just sayin'.

Cover Image Credit: We Heart It

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I Went From Losing Weight To Lifting Weights, And Now I'm In The Best Shape Of My Life

How a change in my fitness goals changed my life.

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I am in the best shape of my life...or at least I think so, and that's what truly matters.

I look in the mirror and feel confident.

I finally feel comfortable wearing crop tops, and I'm even starting to show visible abs. But getting here has been such a difficult journey filled with eating disorders, body dysmorphia, and other physical and mental struggles that hindered my ability to achieve my goals.

I have been on this health and fitness journey for many, many years now. I've been a size 00, a size 12, and every size in between.

Through it all, I have learned so much about myself, as well as fitness and nutrition in general. My biggest takeaway that led me to overcome all these obstacles was learning to let go of my perfectionism. When I'm old, I don't want to look back on my life and realize that I spent it all trying to lose weight. So, I changed my mindset.

My new focus was to be as strong as possible—to lift the heaviest weights, rather than losing the most weight. If you too, want to be in the best shape of your life but have struggled for so long, read my tips below.

1. EAT MORE

I know, it sounds crazy. As women, we are constantly told about diets and cutting calories. If you just want to be skinny, you can do that. But if you want to be strong, you need to eat to be able to put on the muscle.

2. ALLOW YOURSELF TO HAVE CHEAT MEALS

If you have struggled with eating disorders like me, satisfying your cravings will prevent you from having major setbacks.

3. LIFT WEIGHTS

Get your butt off that elliptical and into the weight room.

4. DON'T WORKOUT EVERY DAY

Again, especially if you want to build muscle, you need rest days. These are the days where your muscles are "actually" growing.

5. DON'T RUSH IT

You will not see abs overnight. It takes a long time. But if you want sustainable results, you must treat your body right.

I hope these tips are helpful. With positivity and patience, you can achieve anything.

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