When I came to the University of Kentucky as a freshman in the fall of 2018, my first expectation was to immediately make tons of friends. UK is a huge school, after all; there would be new opportunities to meet people all the time… right?
My experience with making friends was a little different than most. Being the youngest of three sisters, it seemed as if the friendships came naturally to them when they began college. I expected the same to happen to me, but it seemed like when I came to college I was forcing friendships. My roommate and I did not really interact, and it was almost like everyone else had people they knew--I came to college knowing absolutely no one. I was desperate for friends, and it showed. It seemed like everyone around me was having fun and hanging out with their friends all of the time, and I was pretending to have a good time but felt overwhelmed and lost. I didn't have enough money to join a sorority, and I was having a hard time finding something else to get involved in. I didn't know what to do.
Eventually, I met people who I thought would be good friends that stuck by me throughout college. I felt very pressured to do everything in my power to keep them around, since they seemed like they would be around for awhile. I wanted so badly to be a part of a friend group, no matter how big or small. Sadly, I think my disparity got the best of me and drove those people away after a falling out. I was devastated, and felt like UK wasn't a good fit for me and that I might have needed to go home. I felt discouraged, out of place, and downright lonely.
I told my mom that if my second semester went the same way that my first one did, I would transfer to a school close to home. However, things turned around spring semester. I got more involved in organizations that I was passionate about and met a lot of great people. I was exposed to a whole new group of people in new classes. I tried my best to just be myself during the second semester, and it worked wonders. I stopped trying so hard, and when I realized that there were some people who liked me for who I was, it gave me the confidence boost I needed to make even more friends. Now, I am so thankful for everyone who I get to call my friend. I can't wait to get back to school, and start my second year at the University of Kentucky.
Me with some of my great friends that I grew closer to my spring semester. They're real stars!
To anyone just starting out in college: take it day by day. Things may not go as you plan initially, but trust the process. If you find that you do need to transfer schools, don't be ashamed. Just do what's best for you. I was on the edge of giving up, but decided to try just one more time--and it was the best decision I could have made.
