Observation notebook #1

All I had to do was cut off my leg.

Hacking the said extremity from my body was a more difficult task than I had imagined, but I pushed through by means of determination.

I now say with a huge amount of confidence that my willpower is superbly high. After all, nothing can fully test one’s level of resolve than with self-induced harm.

Whose to say it didn’t help me in the long run? I think it actually boosted my self-esteem, and for once in my short, bright life, I felt important, as if I was apart of something immensely larger than myself.

Sure, it was a bit of a mess in my room, on the bus, and especially on campus, trailing blood out of my empty right pant leg, not to mention struggling to refine my hopping methods from one class to the other (especially up and down any set of stairs) so that I didn’t look like an awkward limping penguin. However, it was worth it, and I can honestly say, it’s been a whole month since the loss of my limb, a change I wouldn’t take back for nothing!

I knew I was on to something, so to persuade others to the same path I chose, I brought my lost limb with me, wherever I went.

In fact, I remember the first time I dramatically hopped into class, and flopped the freshly dismembered leg onto a nearby available desk. The silence around me was insurmountable but I just smiled around me, in a patient, all knowing expression. Meanwhile, blood flooded my desk, dripping down the edge like deep red stalactites. I sat down anyway, reasoning, I would look like a serial killer if I just stood there dumbly waiting for someone to approach me.

The silence stretched.

I finally thought that the reason no-one approached me was because they simply didn’t understand. Realizing this, I turned around to face the class and explained, some people don’t seem to get it. You must go the extra mile to achieve what you want, and that includes sacrificing your way of life.

The students around me didn’t seem too impressed so I resolved myself, and retrieved from my backpack, a saw. Dramatically twirling it around, I hacked off my left arm and plopped the other limb down next to my left leg. I felt a little faint headed from the blood loss, but remained steady, for I knew I was on the right path.

I might have looked a little worse for wear, but it was well worth the price, for I got all my class essentials: textbooks, textbooks, and did I mention? Textbooks.