Early Wednesday morning, I saw a tweet that rocked my world.
This came from my university. I am a Tri Delt. I am disgusted.
In what world is this OK? Who woke up one day and decided it was appropriate for young men boys to speak like this?
I read this post several times, just to really process it all. "I Don't mean buffet food so get those Tri delts and Adpi's out of your head (unless you're about that in which case I say send it and wish you the best)."
What. The. Hell.
To the boys, who wrote this, who liked this, who support this — I hope you realize how filthy and appalling your behavior is. I do not believe that all of your "brothers" are like this, and it is sad to know all of them will wear this reputation for the rest of their college days.
But what is even more upsetting is the message behind this. I'd quote it, but I'm sure you can read it a few more times yourself.
This is NOT OK. Nothing about this is "normal" or "acceptable."
The honest truth? This is the type of thing that gets fraternities and sororities shut down. This is the culture that allows boys to shove more and more alcohol down members' throats, all in the name of "brotherly fun." This is the type of post that drives beautiful young women to drink more, to eat less, to forget who they are so maybe, just maybe, they can be seen as something other than "buffet like food" in the eyes of their peers.
Hazing is not tolerated at WSU. It says so, right on the WSU Center for Fraternity and Sorority Life website.
Bullshit.
There is hazing at WSU, but nobody gives a damn. There is hazing all over the U.S. in Greek chapters, sports teams, clubs, elite organizations, and much more. Hazing is everywhere, but nobody wants to do anything about it. It is a tradition. It's not that bad. BetaApplePie hazes more, so the other chapters are fine.
No.
This? It has to stop.
We are putting people's lives at risk. People are dying, and for what? To prove they are a true brother or sister for the next four years of their life? I don't think so.
When I went into recruitment, I told myself I wouldn't tolerate any behavior that remotely resembled hazing or peer pressure. I received a bid, I pledged, I went through initiation, I initiated my own littles, my littles initiated their littles and never, not once, was I told or made to do something I did not want. Never.
Guess what? I am just as loyal to my chapter and my sorority sisters as any other chapter on my campus. I didn't have to prove anything. I just had to be myself. You don't have to haze members to create a bond.
This screenshot is blowing up Twitter and Facebook, and I don't know what is going to happen in the next few days. After behavior like this, it makes me scared for anybody to set foot in their house again. Even if this was a "joke" or just the actions and words of a few, it still is coming from members of this chapter and members of my Greek community.
This chapter is not alone. Parties like this happen all the time, and not just at WSU. Girls are nothing more than a prize to take home and to tell the boys about. Drugs and alcohol are the only two food groups. Consent...what is consent? If they don't say no, they must mean yes.
We have to stop.
I do not think that clearing all college campuses of fraternities and sororities is the solution. There is good that comes out of chapters, and there are so many amazing people in them for all the right reasons.
What I am saying, though, is that this culture and this behavior have to come to an end. There need to be expectations and limits, as well as consequences for neglecting them. We have to stop turning a blind eye to the things we don't want to deal with. This has to stop.
To all my Tri Delt and ADPi ladies, f*ck them. You are so much more than what trashy frat boys think of you. You are strong, independent women, and you don't need that in your life.
Change and progress start with all of us. Let's get started. We have a lot of work to do.
***
After writing this, the chapter released a statement apologizing for the actions of the member responsible for this post. While I am thankful they made this statement, it is still important that we all realize there is so much more to this issue than just this one member in this one situation.
