I don't follow New Years Resolutions. I don't like them and I probably never will. And no, my dislike of the tradition does not stem from a trauma fueled New Years disaster. It is fueled by other peoples disasters.

I like making goals for myself and trying to hit them when I feel is the best time. It works for me and I have no problem doing this, but I can only do this when I am free from judgement and time constraints. Making sure I lose weight within a certain amount of time makes me feel like I have no control over myself. The resolution has control because I am forcing myself into doing something I really don't want to. Well, at least within a small amount of time.

And no, obviously the resolution doesn't force me to do anything I do not want to do. I ultimately have control of my own actions. But there is some part of my that starts panicking when I have to do something and I cannot control the time or the how. I just have to do it, and if I don't? Welp, there goes my self esteem and confidence for the year.

It is so discouraging to set a resolution for yourself, and then not complete it within the time you wanted. You feel like a failure, someone who has no control over their lives and what they want to accomplish. I mean, if you can't do this basic thing you wanted to get done a year ago, how are people going to see you professionally? How are they going to treat you with deadlines, knowing you couldn't even complete a personal one?

It is easier and far better, if I must say, to just go with the flow and hit your targets as you go. Maybe this sounds too zen, but I will set a goal in mind and complete that goal within two months. If I liked that goal and completed it, I will continue with the goal for the next two months. If something happens where I do not accomplish what I set out to do, I get mad at first, take a deep breath, and move on to the next goal in mind. I will come back to it at a later time because maybe I wasn't mature enough for that goal at that time.

New Years Resolution are good for some people, it can motivate them to go to the next level and accomplish their goals. It can help them figure out their life at that time and make for a better current situation. New Years Resolutions also helps people get ready for the new year. Who do you want to be this year? What did you do last year that you must continue? Is there anything to let go of? I like these parts of Resolutions, but the tradition as a whole puts me on edge.

I would much rather go with my own pace and if I want to accomplish something, I will do it on my own time. Not with people asking me constantly if I am keeping true to my promises. Not with a heavy heart thinking I am not good enough for myself or others. Not setting unrealistic expectations that I know are unrealistic yet set them anyway because that is the standard. I will complete my goals and I will reach my dream, just at my own pace and time. Every flower grows at their own rate, not everyone blossoms at the same time.