Whether it’s a swipe right, a slide in the DM's or a “netflix and chillin”, finding out what and who to spend your time on in college is difficult. Between studying for exams and turning in assignments, finding a person who's willing to both respect your time and be there when you need them. With Valentine’s Day coming up, I find myself reminiscing on relationships and “situationships” of my time so far in college. Here is a little advice and a few tips for cracking the code to college dating and relationships.
1. DO NOT RUSH INTO ANYTHING!!!
The best thing about college is we have time (sometimes too much time). Don’t rush to find the one because everyone else around you seems to have been with their soulmate since 9th grade. People change, things change, and we as college students change more fickle than Louisiana weather. It’s okay not to know. It is more than okay to take your time. NEVER be pressured.
2. Dive deeper than just the skin.
We hear it all the time, “Beauty is only skin deep.” But in college where half the campus looks like they just stepped off the Yeezy Season fashion show runway, it’s hard to not get caught up in appearances. However, I promise it’s best that you don’t. At the end of the day, it’s true what your parents told you about it being the inside that counts. You don’t fall in love with what someone looks like, you fall in love with who they are, their favorite things, their life stories. It’s good to get to know someone physically, like that’s fun, but the true connection comes when you look past what the eye can see.
3. Make them work for you.
In college, it’s all about keeping busy. You have at least 4 years (maybe more) to have any person you want. With that being said, don’t let the first person to sweep you off your feet blind you to all your other possibilities. EVERYTHING is better when you work for it, especially relationships. If they are truly yours, they will understand and if they’re not, you’ll at least be able to decide whether to waste your time or not.
4. The right person will be right. Don’t force it.
I, unfortunately, had to learn this lesson the hard way. However, it was one of the most important things I have learned in college. It’s important to really give people a chance, especially if they show you they are worth one. But if you’re just dating them for companionship, 11 times out of 10 that relationship will not work out. The relationship that will work will be the one that blossomed naturally. Maybe it was that cute person from your Chemistry lab or maybe it’s your best friend since the time you set foot on campus; whoever it may be, when you find them YOU WILL KNOW. Trust yourself.
5. Love yourself before ANYONE else.
Before you even begin to consider dating anyone else, the most important advice I can give is that you love yourself first. Learn what you like, adapt to college and just overall be who you are without anyone else. As much as we depend on others to shape our experiences, it is the time alone where we can grow in life and in love.
Happy swiping, sliding, and chilling!!
