I have been babysitting since the beginning of time (okay that's not entirely true but probably since I was like 12 years old), and have now been a nanny for almost a year. Needless to say, I have experience with children of all ages. So while sometimes kids can be little blessings, they can also be big trouble. But as nannies, I think there are a few things that we all know to be true.
1. Small children are the sassiest beings on the planet
You do not know sass until you have spent a day with like a 7 year old girl. Children have absolutely no filter and do not care if they hurt your feelings, they're going to tell you how it is.
2. You become aware of every single pothole and bump on the roads
You never really noticed them before but now every bump and pothole you hit you're thinking "oh my gosh I hope they don't go home and tell their mom I'm some awful driver." Though, there are the view children who love when you drive into a pothole or go over a bump because they feel like they're on a rollercoaster.
3. You have a kid friendly playlist on your phone
4. When people think the kids are yours
5. You know which kid shows are great and which ones are literally the worst
I'm looking at you, Caillou. Get off the air, you whiny brat.
6. Becoming friends with moms at the pick up line and realizing you're like 20 years younger than them
I'm talking to them about the stress of my college exams and they're telling me about the stress of their midlife crisis, it's whatever.
7. Crying no longer phases you
We all used to give in to every cry spell and temper tantrum when we first started. But now we we're immune to it. You can sit there and cry all you want, I'm still not letting you eat chocolate for dinner.
8. Everything is always sticky
And we never know why.
9. They give you the weirdest gifts
As long as it isn't a booger, a bug, or something that was previously in their mouth, I'm happy they thought of me.
10. You hate being called a babysitter
I know some of you don't understand why that's annoying but calling me a babysitter implies that this isn't a serious job and I should be out doing something else. I'm a nanny. Not a babysitter. Get it right.
11. Kids being quiet for a long period of time is never a good thing
Quiet = getting into trouble
12. Talking on the phone is difficult with the kids around
"Yes I can meet for dinn- JIMMY PUT THAT DOWN. Sorry, but where do you want to go to eat we can- JIMMY I SAID PUT THAT DOWN. I can drive, I'll pick you up at- JIMMY I SWEAR IF YOU DON'T PUT THAT DOWN YOU'LL BE SORRY."
And there is always the fact that children ALWAYS want to talk to whoever you're on the phone with. "Can I say hi?"
13. There is nothing better than a small human complimenting you
There is NOTHING better than a small, little girl looking up at you and telling you you're as beautiful as a Disney princess. NOTHING.
14. Expect the unexpected
And always have lots of wipes on hand.
15. You wouldn't want any other job
Kids aren't perfect but neither are you and they come with a whole lot of fun attached.
