The DMV, my own personal hell— it's right up there with the post office, waiting in line at the bank and Chucky Cheese’s. This place is the bane of my existence. As I look around this crowded room, I cannot see a single face that looks excited to be here. Not one. Every time I need to come here I strategically plan it out, I rationalize when the best time to come would be, and I make myself prepared as possible—every time is just like the last… Miserable.
You would think with the evolution of technology, the process would be streamlined and the subtle smell of farts mixed with disappointment wouldn’t be so overpowering. This trip to the DMV, however, is not for me. My better half is getting her license renewed and since her license is expired—being the law-abiding citizens we are—I brought her here. Now I feel like I am in the middle of a hostage situation, being tortured by the flatulence of hundreds of impatient, yet surprisingly patient strangers.
I wonder how many people here are in the same position as I am waiting for their friend, lover, or the dude that kicked him a few bucks to take him to the god forsaken DMV for whatever reason. I wonder how many other people are internally debating whether or not they should be breathing through their mouths or their noses—would I rather smell it or taste it?
As I continue to survey the room I see some children that are bored out of their minds—literally coming unglued. If they only knew that it is equally as boring for us adults as it is for them. The only real difference is the unacceptable nature of adults completely losing their minds in public because there is something else they would rather be doing than marinating at the DMV. Trust me kid, I am right there with you. In fact at little part of me is rooting that kid on because he is projecting outward how I feel on the inside right now. I too am hungry, I too am bored, and I too want to get ice cream for having to come here. The only difference here is I can buy my own ice cream, and I haven’t made a fool out of myself and made this experience at the DMV that much worse for everyone else.
