Over the past year I have found myself a little more paranoid when it comes to leaving my house, but only because that is what the new reality of the world has brought me to. It seems lately all we hear about is people committing mass murders, cops being shot, and cops hurting innocents. There is always been a risk when it comes to walking out the door or even staying indoors, but it seems as if the risk is only getting higher. It is as if we are at a pass, will it get better or will it get worse?

I know I am not alone in this feeling, I see more security precautions being taken at events and I hear people opting to stay home instead of going to a big concert all because this new world has brought a fear to the surface of our minds. I see parents who are more reluctant to let their kids out to play. As a society we have become distrusting in our surroundings and distrusting of our peers. I was walking the streets near my college campus when a family walked by and the dad saw me and pulled his kids behind them to hide them from me. All I could think was, “I am a female that is only five feet tall what danger could I possibly cause to a family of five, I am outnumbered.” The truth is he didn’t trust me not to hurt them even though I had no intention of hurting anybody, but the catch is he doesn’t know what is going through my mind so there was no way to ease his fears except to just keep on walking and mind my business.

Something I am not proud to admit is I find myself judging people a lot more just by their looks, asking myself “does this person look like they would shoot up a public place?” Honestly, what does a person who is about to commit a crime look like? Everyone is the answer. Appearances are surface level, looking at someone’s clothes isn’t going to enlighten you on what their state of mind is. You can’t just look at someone, see them wearing all black with their hair in their eyes and avoid them because you think they are dangerous just because they look like they could cause trouble. I will tell you now I love to wear black, not because I’m making a lifestyle choice, but because I like it and it makes me look slimming. Does that make me the next mass murderer? No.

Many people have been telling me that society comes together amidst the chaos, which it’s true we do, but why do people have to die for us to band together. Parents, children, and friends, why did they have to die to get some common courtesy out of society. If only we would hold each other up not only in our time of need, but in the time of happiness as well, we might be able to get past the shortcomings of the past and prevent future problems from arising. It’s hard to be so mad at someone to the point of killing them if we don’t give them a reason to be mad at us in the first place.