As a 23-year-old woman, I like to think of myself as a very low-maintenance person.

I just require sleep and food, maybe a nice head-rub every now and then. I might be picky with my food when we go out, and I'll most likely wake you up in the middle of the night because I can't sleep.

And sometimes I just want to lie in bed all day and have you bring me all of my food. On second thought, I don't think asking for you to be waiting on me hand and foot is too extreme.

Like I said, my needs are very simple.

However, the older I get the more I realize that I'm not cut out for people. So when you can only stand to stay out at a bar for 30 minutes, what kind of love life can you expect to have?

1. There are only a few people I've let into my inner circle. and even they annoy me

2. I would much rather be snuggled in my blankets than go out on a date

3. Better yet, I'd rather be eating than going on a date

4. In fact, the only time I'll agree to go out on a date is for the food—buy me breadsticks and I'm all yours

5. Boys are afraid to talk to me out at the bars because I am grumpy cat

6. Getting dressed for a date is physically and mentally exhausting, and will require 10 outfit changes before I walk out the door

8. Anyone who dates me needs to know that I will go periods of time without wanting any attention

9. But the moment I do want your attention, be prepared to give me all of it

10. Lastly, I am OK with being pampered because I know that I am a queen