Dear Snow,
Listen, I know you're coming soon. You flurried a little the other day just to say a gentle "hey," but don't lie. We all know you, what you're capable of, what you're planning to do.
Don't get me wrong, I can make a mean mini snowman and without you, that mini snowman is nothing. Sledding down steep hills is actually really hard when you're not around. Believe me, I've tried it once or twice. Snowball fights? Always a great time. (That is until you slam against our bare faces or seep into that tiny gap between our gloves and sleeves that we didn't even realize was there.)
Oh and I can't forget how great you are to photograph. Seriously, pictures of me playing in the snow make me look so much more interesting. So thanks, I guess, but you know I'm missing the point here.
Driving in you drives me crazy. My birthday is February, so not only was I a new driver, but I was a new driver with you around. Even if new drivers claim they don't know everything about driving, deep down they think they know everything about driving. I got away with that for two winters, but last year you were kind of brutal and I'm not feeling it again. All I wanted was some Arby's and instead endured the most terrifying and agonizingly slow car ride of my life. Oh, and I still got Arby's. I'm not 2 minutes away from school anymore, it's more like 13. That's 11 more minutes for you to toss me around and mock me than before so can you maybe take it easy? My university has over 25,000 people and I'm pretty confident that at least half have never driven on you. Some have probably never even seen you before. My car has a cute butt and he's not looking to get rear ended this year.
Your time to shine is Christmas, there's even a song written for you. "I'm dreaming of a white Christmas," emphasis on the Christmas, okay? No need to show off for 3-4 months, we get it, we know you're there. So unless you're merely flurrying on by, can you just chill?
Sincerely,
A Driver Who Just Wants A Break
