My Degree Terrified Me In School And Still Does Years After Graduating | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Student Life

My Degree Terrified Me In School And Still Does Years After Graduating

I'm afraid of choosing the wrong path.

150
My Degree Terrified Me In School And Still Does Years After Graduating

I graduated from the UAlbany in May 2018 with a Bachelor's in English. I studied English as a major and my minor was Journalism. After years of studying, sleepless nights, and expensive loans, I have to ask myself if it was worth it?

When I first told everyone what I was going to school for, they always asked the same thing.

"Oh, so you want to be a teacher?"

I heard that a lot and I would give the same answer every time.

"I don't really know what I want to do. So I decided to go with English."

That wasn't the whole truth. It's not that I didn't have any idea, I had too many ideas. One week I would want to work on becoming an author and finish one of the drafts I had written for a book idea. The week after, I would think about getting a job in publishing. To be honest, teaching never really crossed my mind. I thought being an English major would free up some mental space in my head. I was hoping it would be a stress, less major. I was wrong.

I remember the looks of disappointment and anger my friends would give me when I told them I had to pull an all-nighter working on a paper, or reading the next few chapters, or proofreading an article for an assignment. I had friends who were Business majors and others who were Political Science majors. They would get offended when I complained about the work I had to do. They figured I had it easy and I shouldn't have complained. They didn't know the pain of trying to find that exact quote on that exact page that proves whatever argument you were making in your paper. They didn't know the struggle of trying to find the purpose of that one word in the poem that showed the underlying meaning of it.

It was exhausting, to be honest. It felt like my creative energy was being drained. The vast river of creativity that I had in my head was being pushed into one constricting tunnel. I didn't have any time or energy to write the stories I wanted to write.

Looking back, however, I did learn a lot. I learned how to analyze every paragraph, stanza, and even line in a piece of literature. I learned grammar, APA writing style, and the most important lesson I learned was the importance of proofreading. I know that sounds insane but up until college, I hated reading my own work. All these skills are very useful out of college but the original problem that I had still remains.

It's not that I have no options with an English degree, I have so many options to choose from. It's been one year since I graduated and I still have no clear idea about what I want to do.

It might sound condescending, but it's a terrifying experience having so many options to choose from. Instead of just a fork in the road, there are dozens of turns and side roads to take. Imagine facing all this with no road map and no compass. You could end up going down a road and find yourself miserable at the end of it. Then you realize you wasted all that time walking that path.

That's my biggest fear.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Relationships

20 Things You Forgot To Thank Your Mom For

Moms are super heroes dressed in yesterday's clothing and they deserve an award for that.

971
family
Facebook

Dear Mom,

You took care of me and my brothers our entire lives and you still continue to! I will not be able to truly grasp all of the hard work that you put into this family until I create my own one day. But, I know that there are plenty of times I forgot to give you a simple thank you or an appreciative smile. I thank you for everything that you have done for me and will continue to do for me. Here are some examples of those times where you had my back and I forgot to pat your back for saving me:

Keep Reading...Show less
pumpkin
Holytaco.com

College is hard. As people ages 18-22, we’re just trying to figure out what we’re doing with our lives, our careers, our eating habits, exercise routines, sleep patterns, and other necessities for adult life. We definitely don’t take proper care of ourselves; it’s basically impossible when we have essays, tests and readings due and somehow we’re supposed to eat right, exercise and sleep. We’re doomed to get sick. I have zero experience in science but when I get sick there are certain things I do to make myself better.

Keep Reading...Show less
Bob's Burgers
Hyannishyball

First of all, there is no shortage of fun when you're together.

And you often find yourselves entertaining each others terrible ideas.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

The Unwritten Rules Of "Talking"

What is "talking?" How does one "talk?"

9022
girl holding phone
NYCPRGIRLS

Now that it seems “talking” is the new way to date, and will stay that way until another idiotic term is used to describe the people who can’t settle down and just date someone, I feel as if it’s time to go over the unwritten rules of “talking.”

Rule 1. Having feeling without feeling.

Keep Reading...Show less
The Stages of Having FOMO in College
iamthatgirl.com

Are you one of those people that gets super upset when you miss out on anything? Well, you may have FOMO, or fear of missing out. In college it’s not hard to experience FOMO every once in a while. You just love doing everything and anything, so hen you have to miss out on something it's the worst possible thing in your mind. Whether you’re sick, have to work, or have so much work to do you could cry – FOMO will hit you hard in college.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments