My Confession To You
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

My Confession To You

21
My Confession To You
Wikipedia

By the time you read this, whoever be drawn in, it is safe to say that I will be in Four Winds Mental Hospital for the second time. This was not typed up soon before you read it – know that I’ll be home soon. The topic matter, however, is not time sensitive.

What I want to talk to you about today is what is commonly referred to as ‘caretaker codependency’. A blessing, and a curse. It is shining armor, lined with inward facing thorns.

So, what is it? What the hell does that even mean? Well, this is a form of codependency in which the codependent person tries to fix everyone’s problems, usually out of worry or self-proclaimed responsibility. This behavior is most commonly seen in those close to an alcoholic, particularly family members. Shoutout to Dad for the new set of armor.

Time and time again, coworkers and affiliates otherwise have noted the behavior. I do well in retail, love to host parties, and make sure my loved ones are well cared for as best I can. The people around me are my focus, and if an atmosphere or mood of a room changes, I’ll be the first one to tell you.

Seems great, right? Well, not exactly.

On the bright side of things, yes, caretaker codependency breeds selfless and passionate people, and “paying it forward” is not occasion to them, it’s a daily ritual. But the behavior has its negatives, and doesn’t come without a price.

Those who struggle with caretaker codependency rely on others’ happiness to find purpose, which, I’m sure you know, simply isn’t sustainable. Those who find themselves in this position have an extremely tough time letting go of people, and easily feel like a failure when they cannot deliver. Worst of all, they try to please everyone. We’ve all learned from a young age that this simply isn’t possible.

Don’t be alarmed. Try and be patient. We mean well.

For those of us who are in touch with our problem that is caretaker codependency, we know that sometimes, our attempt to please everyone has hurt another, which truthfully makes us feel worse. Again, we wish everyone could be happy, even if some of those people have wronged us.

It’s a tough case, all in all. It’s a fine line between pathological, and normal human behavior. Everyone wants to make people happy. Everyone wants to deliver. But it’s when you don’t take care of yourself as a result of pleasing others.

Here, to those who still read, is my confession. I don’t know if I’m writing this more for you or me, but I’m writing it, and that’s what matters. When I went to Four Winds for the first time, I absorbed knowledge. I listened, learned, and even raised my hands frequently. All until the codependency group. I reared, and huffed and puffed, and told my friends and family that there was nothing wrong with this behavior, that I was passionate and that people wish they could find people who love with their whole heart. Part of that is true, passion is good. But the truth is, this is a problem for me, and, in an indirect way, is a way of me putting my emotional weight on people.

In owning up to my flaws, as I always seek to as it’s necessary for growth and development, I want you to know that there is likely a case in which I have done this to you. It’s not fair, and I’m sorry.

This may be my last article to you, it may not. Right now, I’m going to focus on making me better, and giving the world the William Pattee it deserves.

Be well.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

How Much Money Do You Need to Start A Franchise

If you are thinking about starting a new franchise, you probably wonder how much money you need to start a franchise? Franchises can be a very profitable business, but they are also quite complex than many people realize. Not only do you have to find a profitable niche in an already existing market, but you also must find the right franchise to operate in that niche.

16270

If you are thinking about starting a new franchise, you probably wonder how much money you need to start a franchise? Franchises can be a very profitable business, but they are also quite complex than many people realize. Not only do you have to find a profitable niche in an already existing market, but you also must find the right franchise to operate in that niche. If you aren't knowledgeable of how franchises work, this article will hopefully equip you with the information you need to determine the amount of money you need to invest in starting your own franchise.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Sometimes I Prefer The World A Bit Blurry

Ignorance is actually pretty bliss...

59618
Photo by JERRYANG on Flickr

I have been wearing glasses since I was seven years old. When I was young, I loved wearing my glasses. Noticing each individual leaf on a tree or the distinct smile lines on my mother's face was an absolute dream. Now I prefer to take off my glasses at times, despite being considered legally blind. Twinkle lights glow brighter when blurred. It is easier to ignore the graying hairs when viewed in a softer light. All in all, the famous cliche "ignorance is bliss" couldn't be truer.

Keep Reading... Show less
Olivia White

"The American flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies from the last breath of each solider who died protecting it."

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Separation Anxiety in Pets

Separation anxiety in pets is a real thing and recognizing the warning signs is important.

515827

Since March, Covid-19 required most of the world to quarantine in their homes. Majority of people ended up working from home for nearly five months. This meant pet owners were constantly with their pets giving them attention, playing with them, letting them out etc. Therefore, when the world slowly started to open up again and pet owners began returning to normal life work schedules away from the home, pet owners noticed a difference in the way their pet acted. Many pets develop separation anxiety especially during this crazy time when majority people were stuck inside barely leaving the house.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments