I clearly remember the day I realized I wanted to become a musician. I was 11 years old, and a little shy. As many of us recall, we all had to learn how to play those lovely, plastic recorders. The one I had was purple and I bedazzled it with pink, blue, and silver gems. I didn't know how to count, read, or interpret music yet and I surly didn't understand the meaning of the word "tune".
Towards the end of my fifth grade year, the public elementary schools in my county were holding a singing production. However, not everyone could join. My music teacher walked into my homeroom and announced that if anyone wanted to audition, then they needed to come to his room right away. I never sang in front of anyone before. In fact, I never really tried singing. I would pop in the latest Hannah Montana album into my portable CD player and pretend to be on stage, dancing and singing to all of my imaginary fans. Unlike the privacy of my bedroom, I walked into my music teacher's classroom and found it filled with at least 30 students my age, all goofing around with each other. I froze with fear.
The audition consisted of singing "Happy Birthday" in front of all the kids in the classroom. This was my worst nightmare. What if they laughed at me? Or made fun of me? I knew then I wasn't going to be able to give it my best, so I awkwardly halfway sang/spoke the lyrics to the 10 second song. As you may of guessed, I hung my head with defeat and walked out of the classroom. I didn't get the part.
Later that year I started middle school and decided that since singing wasn't my calling, I would try learning the flute. I remember opening it the very first day of class. The new metal against the blue velvet casing was the most gorgeous instrument I had ever seen before. I was determined to be the best. This would be what I was good at, and it ended up to be. I won many competitions, placed first chair, took lessons with the most talented flute teacher, and gained confidence in my musical abilities. Then everything changed.
My sophomore year I transferred schools. I went from the best music program in Nash county to a school that maybe only 10 kids were active in. I was the only flute player while everyone else played the piano, guitar, or was a singer... so I decided to give all three a shot.
The first time I actually sang in front of someone was when the music teacher at my new school asked me if I could sing a scale for him to test the microphones in the auditorium. I had been practicing years for this moment, from shower jams to singing the hymns on Sunday morning with the orchestra and choir... this was my moment.
I can't remember exactly what happened, but I just sang a simple chord in either C or G major. At first I thought it went terribly, because my teacher didn't say anything, but then he said something that changed my life forever. "Darling, you've got talent that could fill this whole auditorium." Just like that I was singing solos with the school band, the National Anthem every Friday night on the football field, and landing the lead of Dorothy in the Wizard of OZ.
Looking back I find it funny that a plastic, bedazzled recorder was what would spark my love for music. I may have not know that day in our fifth grade classroom, but the defeat I faced with not getting the part was probably the best thing that could have ever happened to me. From that moment on I was determined to practice and express myself with music as much as I could, and that's what I've done ever since.
