My life is crumbling before my eyes! Mom and Rowan went to get the implants quickly last night because someone is onto us. I don’t know how someone found out. Actually, I do, but I can’t tell anyone. Rowan did sneak out the last time I wrote in here and someone must have seen her. It doesn’t even matter anymore though because, like I said before, the slightest suspicion can lead to tragedy. Anyway, they went out to get the implants and they had trouble along the way. I don’t know much except that there was a checkpoint on the way to the surgery center and Mom tried to play it off like Rowan was sleeping so they wouldn’t see her eyes. Apparently, they didn’t take that as an answer and Mom tried to create a distraction, but they had REAL guns. I read about real guns in my history book and it said that there have never been any in Eden. The Greenshirt Officers use stun guns that aren’t meant to kill, but real guns shoot metal out of them that can tear through human flesh. All I know is they shot Mom, but Rowan escaped. Mom gave her life for Rowan and I don’t know where Rowan is or how to help her and I know any minute the doorbell will ring and the Greenshirts will come and arrest both me and Dad. At least we’re in this together. The bags Mom packed full of the little things Rowan owned are still in my room. I don’t have the heart to look through it or even move them. Mom was gonna burn them then completely wash down the house and get rid of the DNA before the investigation started, but she was too late. The only thing that keeps me from breaking is the fact that Rowan is still alive as far as I know and I’m going to cling to that till my last breath.
Everything keeps getting worse and worse. I never thought that Dad would do this to me! I thought he loved me! I thought he loved our family, but apparently, his job and position are more important. He turned me in as a protector of a second child and convinced his co-workers that he had nothing to do with Rowan, that it was just me and Mom. I had a quick and quiet trial and I was sentenced to death. My execution is set for three days. I have three days left and I don’t know anything about what’s going on. All I know is that Rowan hasn’t been captured and that she might still be alive. I hope she doesn’t hear about my execution because I know she would try to save me. She has always been the brave one, despite knowing only three people, and I used to think that she would be a much better member of society than me. If she was born first she could have really benefited Eden, but then if she was first born it would be her here instead of me. This is the first time I’m happy Rowan was born second. The guard is coming so I have to go.
The last day has been a blur and I don’t know what to think. Actually, the last couple of days have been a blur. In the last week, my Mom was killed, my sister went missing, my Dad betrayed me, I was arrested and sentenced to death, and then I was rescued by my sister. That’s right, Rowan broke me out of jail and sent me to a secret underground community of second children. She was supposed to come with us, but she jumped out of the car to throw off an officer and hasn’t been seen since. I’m just as lost as I was when she ran away the first time, but I know she can’t run from the law forever. I know it will one day catch up to her and the fact that I won’t know anything because they won’t let me out of the underground kills me, but you know what the funny thing is? I belong here. Lachlan, a friend of my sisters, told me a story she told him. When my Mom found out she was pregnant with twins she decided that my Dad, who was a doctor, would oversee the pregnancy so nobody would find out and they would be able to keep both of us. The plan went perfect and when my Mom had her first child it was a beautiful baby girl. That’s right. The position of the firstborn in my family goes to Rowan. When Lachlan told me this I felt angry that my parents would lie to us, but then he explained it fully. When my parents had me I was very sick and wasn’t breathing right, they knew they had to take me to a hospital right away. They had to report me as first born or I would have died. If I had died Rowan would have had a normal childhood as an only child, but I’m done wishing I could change the past and throwing pity parties for myself. I’m going to put all my energy into finding Rowan and bringing her back to the safety of the underground if it's the last thing I do. I know I won’t have to do this alone because Lachlan will help and maybe a couple others, but it doesn’t matter how many people I have behind me because nothing is going to stop me.