I Am So Thankful For The Strong Women In My Life

I Am So Thankful For The Strong Women In My Life

They have helped shape who I am today.

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As a kid, I had three major women in my life: my mom, my grandma, and my bubbie (Yiddish for "grandmother").

I can easily say I am all the better for having these women as my role models for life.

My mom and I didn't get along all that well when I was younger. Cliche as it is, it took me leaving home for college for us to really segue into a much healthier mother-daughter relationship. It also helps that we got a dog a few years ago and became crazy dog moms together who send dog memes and videos back and forth.

My mom is and always has been a powerhouse.

My mom worked a lot and taught me the value of putting in the effort. I learned from her to never settle for less than great, to work hard, and not let people walk all over me. She (and my dad) made sure I knew the value of professionalism and how to be professional. There's a reason I ask them to proofread any important emails before hitting send!

My mom is also a total goof.

This pretty much sums us up!

My sarcasm and humor are unquestionably from her. She's one of the funniest people I know and reminds me not to take everything too seriously. Also, the constant dog and baby videos we send one another are the best.

My grandma is my best friend.

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Yes, that's possible. It helps that we share a lot of interests. My grandma has always been my number one supporter and as I got older, became someone I rely so much on for emotional support. I can always count on my grandma to make me smile.

My grandma taught me to love unconditionally, even towards those you are not blood-related to.

She is my dad's step-mom and technically my step-grandmother, but you would never know we aren't blood-related with how she whole-heartedly loves her non-biological grandkids just as much as her biological ones. She made her home into a safe space for me in the years I needed that most.

My bubbie taught me that time apart means nothing when it comes to loving someone.

As I've grown older, I don't get to see my bubbie as much. But I know she is always there if I need her, and I know she loves me.

I recently went to dinner with her and was reminded of just why - and how much - I love my grandmother. She's tough and sweet, smart and funny. We spent most of the time talking about everything from family to theater to politics, and it was a highlight moment of my life. I enjoyed it so much.

I am unbelievably lucky to have not one, but two grandmothers who love me in the way only a grandmother can. They give my life a specialness I wouldn't get from anyone else in my life.

I am so lucky to have a mom who I can have a good relationship with and talk to openly. (And who puts up with my unintentional repetition of stories.)

I cannot thank any of these women enough for being involved in my life.

I love you all, and happy Mother's Day!

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To The Dad Who Didn't Want Me, It's Mutual Now

Thank you for leaving me because I am happy.
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Thank you, for leaving me.

Thank you, for leaving me when I was little.

Thank you, for not putting me through the pain of watching you leave.

Thank you, for leaving me with the best mother a daughter could ask for.

I no longer resent you. I no longer feel anger towards you. I wondered for so long who I was. I thought that because I didn't know half of my blood that I was somehow missing something. I thought that who you were defined me. I was wrong. I am my own person. I am strong and capable and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

In my most vulnerable of times, I struggled with the fact that you didn't want me. You could have watched me grow into the person that I have become, but you didn't. You had a choice to be in my life. I thought that the fact that my own father didn't want me spoke to my own worth. I was wrong. I am so worthy. I am deserving, and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

You have missed so much. From my first dance to my first day of college, and you'll continue to miss everything. You won't see me graduate, you won't walk me down the aisle, and you won't get to see me follow my dreams. You'll never get that back, but I don't care anymore. What I have been through, and the struggles that I have faced have brought me to where I am today, and I can't complain. I go to a beautiful school, I have the best of friends, I have an amazing family, and that's all I really need.

Whoever you are, I hope you read this. I hope you understand that you have missed out on one of the best opportunities in your life. I could've been your daughter. I could have been your little girl. Now I am neither, nor will I ever be.

So thank you for leaving me because I am happy. I understand my self-worth, and I understand that you don't define me. You have made me stronger. You have helped make me who I am without even knowing it.

So, thank you for leaving me.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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My Mom Is My Biggest Weakness In The Best Way Possible

Although my mom is still my parent, she's also a friend.

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My parents are everything to me. They raised me to be independent, strong, smart, and hard working. They made sure to keep me in line, to ensure that I would be respectful and responsible. They raised me to be prepared for the world before I graduated high school. For everything they've done, I'm very grateful.

Focusing on my mom more specifically, she is my weakness. By that I mean, I can go to her with anything and I know she's willing to listen, to be open, and she won't impart judgment.

My mom always knows how to calm me down, but she is the one person who can also make me cry harder. I don't mean this in a bad way. It's just that whenever I've had a tough day or my anxiety has been heightened by some ordeal, I know that if I see my mom or if I even call her over the phone, the waterworks come flooding. I don't know what it is about my mom that makes me feel so emotional, so vulnerable. Each time I go to her, it's almost as if I'm a kid again, crawling into her mother's arms, seeking a nurturing soul to tell me that everything will be okay.

Sometimes I even avoid calling my mom when I'm in a rut because I refuse to cry or feel weak. For instance, if I had a problem, I'd avoid talking to her about it. If a week goes by, I'll update her on my problems, and begin crying about it (even though I was already over it beforehand). My mom can bring out anything from me. She laughs when I tell her this because she knows that no matter how old her baby girl gets, she'll always need her mama.

I think as I've gotten older, I've realized how much more my parents mean to me. As a kid, I always felt like they were against me. I felt as if they didn't want me to do anything and didn't want me to grow. As an adult, I realize it's the exact opposite. My parents have always wanted what's best for me, and because I've grown to understand this, I feel so much closer to them.

I feel as though now, although my mom is still my parent, she's also a friend. She's someone I can go to when I feel down, someone I can go to for a good laugh. She's so much better than me in so many ways. She's outgoing, loud, obnoxious, smart, and is always seeing the good in situations. When I talk about my mom to other people, they're always so interested in meeting with her or talking with her. When they finally get the chance to, they're instantly drawn to her character. They're drawn to her laughter. I kid you not, my mom can light up a room in seconds. She is always the life of the party. It sometimes makes me jealous when people find out how amazing my mother is because I swear they'd rather be friends with her than me.

What people don't see is her struggles. They don't see the pain she goes through with her ongoing injury. They don't see that not only does it take a physical toll, but also an emotional toll. She hides it really well because that's what parents are "supposed to do." My mom is the strongest person I know and to see the two contrasts of her is astonishing. To think that someone so full of life can also battle personal struggles, it's hard to see, especially because she's my mom and all I want is the best for her. One part of my mom struggles while the other part of her is so vibrant, so full of life, so sassy.

I don't know how she's put up with all of the hardships in her life. I've never seen someone work so hard and refuse to fail. She refuses to be taken advantage of. I've never seen someone as amazing as my mother. She can do anything.

I think my mom looks down on herself sometimes. I think, like any woman, she sees imperfections. What I don't think she sees, that I wish she would, is the tenacity she has. I want her to see herself the way I do: beautiful, strong, courageous, sassy, outgoing. I could go on and on about how much my mom inspires me and how she's made me appreciate her in more ways than one.

Mom, thank you for all that you do and all that you are. I hope you know how much Rachel, Vanessa and I all love you. I hope you know that no matter what struggles we go through, you are our rock. You hold the fort down and you're always there to make sure we're good, even when you aren't yourself. Thank you for always thinking of us, for believing in us, and for never turning your back. I love you more than you know.

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