We live in a culture where the more flesh you expose, the more praise and admiration you’ll get. From shorts, to shirts, dresses, swimsuits (advertisements especially), and everything in between… the fashion industry is so sexualized that being modest in dress comes across “old fashioned.” You are made to feel by society that if you’re at all bothered by showing off some skin, you lack “confidence.”

I think often people forget or are indifferent to the fact that, “… your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own; For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body” (1 Corinthians 6: 19-20). God loves humility, so flaunting your body around as if it’s a prize to behold does not glorify God… “you are not your own.” Be humble in your dress. Tiny shorts, crop tops, muscle shirts, tight clothing, bikinis, etc. do not glorify God either but rather encourage lustful thoughts from others.

Many say that to a certain degree you are not responsible for lustful thoughts people might have over you... HOWEVER, walking around half-naked because it makes you “feel confident” doesn’t exactly encourage pure thoughts from onlookers. The goal shouldn’t be to draw as much attention to your body as possible, despite what society tells you. It bothers me when people say “males should just control their temptations/ lustful thoughts of women.” Yes this is true… but that’s sort of like walking around with a double-chocolate cake, showing it off to everyone you see, and then expecting them not to want the chocolate cake even a little… and then becoming offended if they do. It is in our nature to have attractions, but it’s how you control them that matters. If you’re walking around dressed modestly and others lust over you, that’s a different story. I absolutely agree that more should be done in regards to teaching young men how to view women with respect and dignity, but it doesn’t help when practically every female around them wears clothing that sexually emphasizes their body.

If the goal is to attract somebody of the opposite gender by how much skin you show off and by how enticing your body looks, you’re doing it wrong. It is so cliché to say that “beauty comes from within” and “people should like you for what’s on the inside,” but it’s true and should be taken to heart. If you attract somebody who’s so focused on your body and it’s what draws them to you most, the relationship is superficial. Most likely, you’ll be viewed as an object, not as a child of God. Good guys and girls appreciate modesty. They see your beauty as a gift from God, and something that should be protected. Spirituality, personality, mind, heart, compatibility, and God especially, should be the focus of a relationship not your bodies.

For some girls, so much time is spent on fashion, make up, hair, etc., that they make it their number one priority- spending hundreds and hundreds of dollars, and hours upon hours of their lives concerning themselves with their outward appearance. The same can be said for guys. Some guys become so obsessed with their appearance, they too become vain; “…vanity of vanities! All is vanity” (Ecclesiastes 1:2). When an over-abundance of time and effort is centered solely around enhancing one’s physical attractiveness, besides it being sinful, it takes away from your natural beauty- actually leaving you looking fake and unoriginal. 1 Peter 3: 3-4 says “Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.” Wear SOME makeup, be SOMEWHAT concerned with how you look, but don’t become obsessed or vain with your appearance.

Instead of being worried about how “hot” you look to others. Be concerned with how “hot” your spiritual life is- how “on fire” you are with love of The Lord; “So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of My mouth” says the Lord (Revelation 3:16). He is not concerned with your appearance the way the world is. 1 Samuel 16:7 says, “But the LORD said to Samuel, ‘Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.’”

Your clothes and outward appearance do not dictate your beauty. God did when He created you; “You are altogether beautiful, my darling and there is no blemish in you” (Song of Solomon 4:7). Your inner-self should be enough, radiating a beauty far greater than anything you could ever throw together from your closet.