"The joy of children laughing around you, these are the makings of happiness." - Curtis Mayfield
What a beautiful and idealistic sentiment. To think that all it takes in this world to achieve joy is something we are free to create ourselves (with the help of a partner obviously) well, to put it bluntly, that's some powerful shit.
I myself am victim to the desire to procreate as outlined in my article on the epidemic of baby-crazy women. We all want to feel that incredible joy, right? Doesn't every single one of us sometimes fantasize about a small and adorable version of ourselves? Well of course we do, we're millennials and we adore ourselves immensely so another us is really just a bonus.
Regardless of this or the fact that I'm quickly approaching 27 and my body is practically screaming at me every month saying "BITCH, FILL UP THIS UTERUS THOUGH!" something in me wants nothing to do with it.
Now before you call me selfish, this isn't about wanting to hoard all of my money or thinking a kid would take up too much time. It's more so about the state of the world and not wanting to put a kid through this for my own sake. Now if you ask me, that seems pretty selfish.
And perhaps that's what it's about for other millennials like me. I used to think when I had friends who said they never want to have kids that they were exaggerating and quite frankly, I thought they were being assholes. In fact, my sister since having her first child has always said: "I'm never having another kid." Which truly baffled me seeing as her first kid fucking rocks. Why would you not want to make another amazing human?
But the older I get and the more terrible things that happen in the world, the more I see her point.
Not wanting to have children isn't always about not wanting the stress of a child, but more so, not wanting to unload the stress of the world onto a child. Between natural disasters and climate change, school shootings, the threat of nuclear war and the Cheeto we've elected president, the idea of leaving this world a better place for future generations has lost its appeal.
It has now evolved into raising generations of children who will make the world a better place and that seems pretty fucking unfair. I'm going to bring a kid into this world and then tell them it's up to them to change the shitty situation I brought them into? Now that's just cruel.
Now I'm sure I'll end up having kids. I want kids. I am with a man that I love and see a bright future full of the joy of children laughing around us. But am I wrong for sometimes thinking that it won't be fair to them?
So sure, we don't know what the future holds and I'll never say never, but maybe don't be so quick to judge those around you who don't want kids. Maybe they are just a little more selfless than you.