“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” -- Maya Angelou

One of my favorite movies and stories is "The Freedom Writers." It is based in Long Beach, California, in the 1990s. Following the L.A. Riots and the O.J. Simpson trial, racial tension was everywhere, especially at Woodrow Wilson High School. A woman by the name of Erin Gruwell, a new teacher at Woodrow Wilson, was assigned to teach a group of 150 very unmotivated and “unteachable” first-year students. The majority of her students were involved in gang activity, the illicit drug trade, and were immigrants to the country. Her students fought one another constantly and refused to seek common ground between one another. That was until Mrs. Gruwell showed them that they are quite the same. She did this through writing. She had her students write every day in a journal. They could write whatever they wanted. Most of them wrote their personal stories. They discovered in time that writing is a powerful form of self-expression that could help them deal with their past and move forward -- together. Today, many of the students destined for a life of hardship or, worse, death, are college graduates, authors, and national motivational speakers and educational mentors. All because of a daily journal.

I love this story because it is my story. My past was filled with anger, depression, fear, and hate. I was always on my guard ready to fight at any moment. I tried to escape my reality by reading. I read nonstop. There was never a time that my face was not in a book. However, every time I finished a great book I became angrier. I always remember sitting in the bed crying, enraged at the fact that I read about these characters achieving all of their desires, while I was still sitting here struggling just to get through the day. Though I had escaped reality for a moment, when I closed that book, it came right back to choke me, seven times stronger.

I went on like this until my first year of college. That first year was nothing short of life-changing. I was taking a composition class for my general education requirements. My professor, Dr. Leslie Layne, had us write weekly journal entries on a specific topic. I hated it at first because writing on my opinions and feelings on a topic made me feel very vulnerable. I felt as if I was slowly ripping stitches out of my wounds from the past. That was until I noticed that the more I wrote, the greater I felt. I felt at peace, I felt empowered. I began to understand that this pen in my hand or these keys at my fingertips were not hurting me; they were in fact healing me. Facing my reality as I wrote ripped those stitches out so God could heal my wounds properly. I began to write more, and the more I wrote, the greater I felt. I wanted to help others who were going through or have endured similar things as myself. So I wrote my story. I wrote about what God has done, is doing, and promises to do for me. I shared what I wrote with a few close friends and they insisted that I share it. So I did. And the responses were unbelievable. I never could have imagined that people would be coming to me, telling me that my writings inspired and encouraged them to do and be better.

Writing is more than scribbling words on paper. It is about expressing yourself in the truest manner. To be a writer is to be a mentor, healer, friend, and anonymous confidant. I could have gone back and truly hurt those who have hurt me with the sword. But through the pen, I gained restitution, healing, and peace of mind. Now that my story is out I can rest peacefully at night. Like The Freedom Writers and like myself, if you wish to genuinely end the agony, write. Tell your story, leave nothing untold within.