So, I have no backup plan. Yeah, I know, I’m crazy. I’ve heard it before. What if it doesn't work out? What if I don’t make it? But, here’s the thing, I do not want to do anything else. Ever since I was little I have wanted to be a doctor. One time I wanted to be a medical examiner for about a month, but that was the only time I have strayed from this path. There is something so selfish about being a doctor, and I am so addicted to that feeling. The high you get when you help people is like the buzz you get from a good cup of coffee, sweet and a little bit overwhelming. Being a doctor means that I would get that feeling everyday. There is no room to fail here, I will succeed because I have no other option.
I know that people thing being a doctor is one of those unselfish jobs. You’re helping people all day, and you’re spending so much of your time doing it. But think about it, doctors are kind of selfish. I mean every pre med student dreams of becoming well known for curing an incurable patient, or finding a new groundbreaking treatment. While we love helping people, and we aren’t all narcissistic assholes, most of us are a little selfish. Why else would we spend so much time in school and at the hospital? If you really think your doctor is there just for the sake of helping people you’re wrong. They’re there because for some crazy reason helping people is how they get their high. For some unknown reason, we dream of having to be on call twenty four- seven. It’s the one thing we have always wanted.
Now, I know what you’re thinking, and yes, I am a little crazy. Why else would I be putting myself through this? Being a doctor is crazy, but for those of us just crazy enough, it is the one thing we can see ourselves doing. I don’t want to be a teacher, or a lawyer, I want to be a doctor. I want to wear scrubs, and never sleep, and live in a hospital. That is the lifestyle that I crave. I want more than anything to spend the rest of my life running from patient to patient, and helping people feel better. I want to meet everyone and anyone, and the best way for me to do that is to be their doctor. Everyone has to see the doctor, right?
You see, being a doctor is so selfish. I am doing this solely because I want to. I’m not doing it for my patients, or my parents, or my future family. I’m doing it for the high that I get from helping people and from meeting people. I am doing it because there isn’t a more selfish profession. I mean, c’mon, being a doctor is a pretty important job, and who doesn’t want to feel important? Who doesn’t want people to wait months to see them? That’s why for me, it’s medical school or bust. It’s the only option, there is no plan B or C. It’s plan A. So when I tell you that I want to be a doctor, don’t tell me that it's such a noble profession, that’s not what I picked it. I picked it because I am selfish, and that is all I want in life.
