It definitely could be argued that it has never been solely about love. Way before any of us were even imagined, marriage was a pact between families. You gave one family your daughter in exchange for something, whatever that something may be. I'm sure love was still something you hoped for at that time, but it wasn't expected.
But c'mon! It's 2019 and everyone is always talking about love: love your neighbor, love your family, love everyone! Still, it seems to me that marriage has become just the thing you do when you don't know how else to further your relationship. But, why? To me, marriage should still be a commitment. Not a 'for now' commitment, a 'forever' commitment.
Marriage should be something you've planned because otherwise, you'll never get through the bad parts with your significant other. Instead, it has become something that is more romantic if it's spur of the moment. It might work once in a while, but nine times out of ten, planning something out will only positively affect the outcome, at least when it comes to marriage.
I do understand that it's really hard to make marriage just about love and commitment, though. So many societal, political and economic issues are tied to marriage. For many, love and commitment isn't enough. Maybe that's due to laws prohibiting their marriage or maybe it's due to policies that would put one or both people into poverty if they were to be married. Whatever the reason, it happens and it SUCKS.
I know marriage isn't a big deal to many, "It's just a label," is something you hear all the time about all different kinds of relationship statuses. For myself, and people like me who need validation that their significant other is committed to them, though, this label is one of the most important labels there is, at least when the time is right.
For us, marriage is saying, "Yes, I love you and I will continue to love you. I will not leave because you made a mistake or messed up. I will not leave because of whatever problems you're facing. I am here, no matter what. You can count on me." But it's not only people like me who want that commitment. Most people deep down want commitment, even if marriage isn't the form they want it in.
Also just as I want someone to commit to me in that way, I also want to commit to someone else in that way. When you promise to love someone forever and help them through whatever they may face, you feel more important in the world. You give more meaning to who you are and what you do. You are not only you, but you are someone who is important to another person.
I want marriage to be important again. I want it to mean something to the world. I want us to disregard religion, politics and anything else that has an influence on marriage. I want it to be just about two people who are in love, committing themselves to each other.
I want marriage to be what I once thought it was. I want it to be about sacrifice, commitment and all the other good and bad things you must go through.
Most importantly though, I want marriage to be about love. Without love, we would all be lost.
