"No good tree bears bad fruit, nor does a bad tree bear good fruit. Each tree is recognized by its own fruit. People do not pick figs from thornbushes, or grapes from briers." - Luke 6:43-45 (NIV)
A tree is known by what it produces. We judge a tree based on the quality of its contents. If we like it, we deem it good. If we dislike it, we deem it bad.
In response to this concept, philosopher Soren Kierkegaard further added that "In the same way, love also is known by its own fruit" (Works of Love). The love that we demonstrate is ultimately known by what comes from it. Furthermore, Kierkegaard makes the distinction between forms of worldly love (self-love, 'corrupting attachments', etc.) and 'Christian' love. Christian love, to Kierkegaard, is the love that stands the test of time. It is eternal in nature.
This particular hair-splitting aspect of love caught my attention, because it begs the question of what is our goal when we choose to love; or if there is even a goal to begin with. Are we aiming to make some lasting impact on those we are directing it towards? Or are we aiming for some temporary satisfaction? Is our love a reflection of God? Although this form of love can be applicable to any relationship, the focus for me recently is learning to how to apply it to modern day romantic relationships.
For me, the issue lies with discerning and ultimately choosing between the love of the world and the love that God calls for. Whenever an opportunity at romance has presented itself, I have found myself at odds with appeasing the other person and standing on principle. Although love involves sacrifice, is it love to lose yourself for the benefit of someone else? By losing yourself, I mean compromising your values and principles in order to gain the affection of the other party. It's the case of following your heart over your mind.
For as nerve-wracking as these reflections can be, they can be crucial for determining the course of your life. Try not to put these off. They can potentially make or break any endeavor you take on.
