Within a friend group lies a multitude of personalities and roles that each person holds. There is the inevitable genius who stores knowledge on any subject possible, the humorous goof who never fails to make the group laugh, and the introvert who snuck in and contributes only, but not limited to, head nods and encouraging smiles.
And then there's you; A bright, bubbly personality and nothing short of an outgoing spirit. It's not always fun to have an opinion on everything and to always crave attention. You have a crass sense of humor and always seem to get in trouble for making all of the right comments at all of the wrong times. What you may consider is your best feature, others may misinterpret as a person who just loves to hear themselves talk.
People always tell you to quiet down, but you don't physically understand how you could be any quieter. You swear you're talking at the lowest volume possible. You don't understand the sly, yet dirty looks that are thrown your way when all you think that you're doing is talking at your normal volume.
You come off too strong. People are offended by your crude humor and abrupt comments but they just don't understand you and how you present yourself. You wish that you could settle down and put on a calm facade, but every time you try, you don't feel like yourself. You don't want people to think that you're out of control, but you also don't want them to perceive you as something that you're not.
Everyone can hear you before they see you. Whether it be walking in a room and announcing yourself before you can be visualized, or talking far too loud in the room next door, everyone will always know you're within yelling distance.
Your phone calls are anything but private. If you're loud in person, you have to be even louder over the phone. Reactions can't be subpar and storytelling has to be better, if not the same as in person. Doors will be slammed and headphones will be put in because no one cares what so and so from back home did last weekend.
You use too much detail when telling a simple story and lose the audience's attention. You can't help but include every facial expression, tone, and you never forget to throw in your snarky side comments as well. Your friends don't even listen and proceed to make you feel as if your thoughts aren't important. You may be the biggest personality in the room, but you'll simultaneously feel like the smallest person.
You're not aggressive, just passionate.
Communicating is so important to you that your excitement about speaking comes off as aggression. Bystanders will misinterpret your hand flailing and body movements for a belligerent story. Your thoughts will flow faster than the words can be formed and your voice will raise inconspicuously, against your will.
The only thing you crave is to make others around you happy.
Being the center of attention is a role that you hold close to your heart - but not for the wrong reasons. You desire the joy that comes from seeing smiles that you caused. You yearn for the approval and laughs of those who surround you and hope that you can be a source of happiness for just a few short seconds. Everyone will mistake you for being conceded, but you can't seem to get your true intentions across.
You try to control yourself and begin to feel embarrassed to speak. You will start to label yourself as an outsider because no one really understands you. You're a loud person, that's just who you are. You may not like it and actually might hate yourself for it. But that's just how it is and although easier said than done, don't be afraid to come to terms with it.
Being loud doesn't mean that you're obnoxious; in fact, it means that you're self-confident and a natural leader. The dirty looks will never go away and the feeling of being judged may never subside, but don't let it stop you from being true to yourself. Let your voice consume a room, let your laugh carry and emit smiles on faces of those around you. Your voice defines who you are as a person and don't let that be compromised because losing your voice is losing yourself.
Having a voice is rare and beautiful, regardless of the consequences. Speak your mind, share your thoughts, and scream your opinions at the top of your lungs without fear.
