Shortly after you graduate high school you find yourself in the “now what?” situation, even if you’re in college, already in the work field, or taking a gap year. Most kids around the age of 18 start to feel a little confused and maybe even a little lost. You’re a legal adult now, yay, but what does that mean, exactly?

Well, first of all it’s time to start becoming your own person if you haven’t already. It can take a while, but you’re going to have to take the time to figure out who you are as a person. The process may last far into adulthood for some, but that’s okay.

This is the time you take for yourself. You have your own life now. It’s completely up to you to decide what to do for the rest of your days and what decisions to make. Some advice is needed and that’s cool too, but don’t let anyone else decide for you.

If you want to major in theatre, good for you. Do what you’re passionate about and the rest will fall into place along the way with a little bit of hard work. Other people are guaranteed to bash you and lecture you about this choice, where you’re going to school, how long it takes you to finish school and pretty much everything else but it’s alright because it’s not their life. Who knows, one day you might become the next Jennifer Lawrence, and you can watch the crowd of people who surrounded you at 18 fall silent.

Another thing people are going to get on you about is your style and the way you look. So maybe you gained a little weight. Maybe you got a tattoo. Maybe you got a piercing or dyed your hair an unnatural color. So what? As long as you’re enjoying yourself and living life to the fullest without harming anyone, there’s nothing wrong with it at all. You are more than your appearance. It doesn’t matter if you’re a size 2 or 20, your personality is what defines you. Not your body.

Relationships are also a big topic around this time for some. It’s easy for outsiders to say who you date reflects back on you as a person and you have to be super careful about who you date in order to keep up appearances or reputations. This is not the case. The only thing that matters about who you date is if they make you happy, make you a better person, and don’t harm you or anybody else. If your significant other truly brings out the best in you and is by your side no matter what, who cares what anyone else thinks. Don’t let negative outside opinions damage a good thing.

As a young adult, your mind gets bombarded with so many new experiences, thoughts, and opinions. This is the time in your life when you need to start living for yourself. Take that class because you want to. Get that piercing because you like the way it looks. Date that boy because he makes you happy. It’s okay to still be learning and figuring yourself out. You’ll make mistakes, but you still live and you learn. Just have a good time while you’re at it.