I remember the good old days of dancing. These were the days before competition wasn’t everything, girls were not wearing the most scantily-clad outfits that they could find, and dance moms certainly were not getting into drunken fights with each other in dressing rooms. These were the times when me and my friends would dance for the fun of it; we did not really care how we scored at competition just as long as we are having fun and were improving. We did cutesy little jazz dances when were young, and slowly grew into developing difficult skills as we got older. We didn’t fear what would happen if weren’t number one all of the time. Most importantly, we weren’t pitting ourselves against our own teammates

Things stayed like this until July of 2011. That is when the Lifetime Television Network decided to air the ever so popular show "Dance Moms." This show highlighted the teachings of the infamous Abby Lee Miller in her then little-known Pittsburgh studio as she got her team of six dancers ready for competitions around the country. Don’t get me wrong; I did enjoy this show at first. 7^th grade me thought that it highlighted the highs and lows of competitive dancing. I saw how it portrayed the hard work that dancers have to put in to become the best dancer that they can be. I especially loved having a television show that I could point to when people asked me what dance was like.

However, as time went on, "Dance Moms" became more ridiculous, and for a short time almost made me embarrassed to be a competitive dancer.

I had to explain to so many people that not all dance teachers are like Abby Lee Miller. Yes, I have had a few strict, crazy ones, but most of my former dance teachers were some of the kindest and most genuine people I have ever met. They cared so much about my well-being in and out of dance and took the moment to ask me how my life was doing. They were like second parents to me. I would be so frustrated and embarrassed for dancers everywhere when I would have to tell my school friends that my teachers don’t throw things at me and make me cry in class when I screw something up.

"Dance Moms" made all dance instructors seem crazy. From the feud between Abby and Cathy, it seemed like to be an “amazing” dancer, you needed to be taught by the meanest, strictest teacher in order to win. The show skewed Cathy’s personality to make her seem wonkier and relaxed to prove their point that discipline is needed to win. While I believe that discipline is important, you don’t need to have a temperamental Abby to win. All my teachers my last year of dance were genuinely nice people. They cared for our mental wellbeing, and would take things slow if we weren’t picking up right away, they would reward us with fun treats when we did exceptionally well, and they overall showed their genuine care for our wellbeing, and this made us respect them more and want to perform well for them. My teachers were role models for my team, and we wanted to perform well for them. Because of this, we could take home several awards for our dances. We didn’t need the harsh bashing and put downs to make us good dancers; all we needed was love.

People also thought that all dance parents were horrible. On the show, the moms would just stand by while their kids were being belittled by the one person who held all their self-confidence in the palm of their hand. Those moms would willingly let their kids go onstage looking like what one of them quoted to be “prosti-tots.” Don’t get me wrong, I have seen my fair share of crazy dance moms, but I know for a fact that my mom would advocate for me when I would be pressured into wearing revealing costumes. My mom would be on my side when I wasn’t being treated fairly in class. Most importantly, my mom would do this with the utmost grace and dignity where she wouldn’t be embarrassing me by screaming at my teachers or getting into full-out brawls with other dance parents. While some dance parents were insanely “dedicated,” I know for fact that there are a lot of moms out there who didn’t act out, but still stuck up for their children.

"Dance Moms" also painted some important styles of dance in a bad light.

The girls who danced on "Dance Moms" were strong lyrical and contemporary dancers. They did really well with these pieces, so their moms would throw hissy fits whenever their daughters were challenged with a new style of dance. They believed that only lyrical or contemporary could win. I can’t tell you how many times I have other styles of dance, other than lyrical or contemporary, perform well in real life. In my many years of dance, I have seen tap dances, jazz dances, and even musical theater dances (styles that are often ridiculed on the show) beat many “amazing” lyrical dances. For example, my own tap solo last year ended up placing 7^th overall out of at least 30 some other solos of my same age, and you want to know why that’s relevant? I beat dozens of lyrical dances. What this show doesn’t get at is that it isn’t the style of dance, the pretty costume, or the choreography that makes you win; it’s the hard work and dedication that you put into your craft that makes you the best dancer you can be.

It also made dancers stop competing against other studios and compete more with their own teammates.

I remember the times when my dance studio and other around me were not competitive with the other groups in their respective studios. I started competitive dance in the year 2007, and this was a time when we would all be genuinely happy for each other when our teammates scored exceptionally well or even higher than us, or when other groups got special awards. With all the rivalry that was portrayed between team members on the show, I saw things start to shift even in my own studio. I saw people start to get jealous when other members of our studio would perform better at competitions. I could literally see people’s faces become green with envy when so-in-so’s duet always seemed to get platinum. Nasty rumors would be spread about how this girl and her team got special treatment because her mom was heavily involved within our studio, or how a different girl only was awarded what she was awarded because she was competing an “easy” style of dance. The overall vibe of every studio in the United States changed from a friendly place for everyone to explore their craft to a place of jealousy and rivalry that I couldn’t stand after Dance Moms went on the air.

The funny thing is that nothing really should have changed since 2011. Dance is a way for people to share a message with the world. Dance is a place where people should feel comfortable enough with themselves to be able to let loose in class and throw away all of their troubles. Dance is still dance; it’s an art form for people to express themselves and show the world what they love in a safe environment. This TV show just skewed people’s beliefs as to what dance should be like. This reality television show made people believe what they were experiencing is not what dance is supposed to be, so the true form of dance disappeared as the catty comments and drama contaminated what dance truly is: a series of movements where people should feel the up most confidence, grace, and power.