Every Lifetime Christmas Movie Ever

Every Lifetime Christmas Movie Ever

I've seen this plot before, but I'm sure as all heck watching it again!
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It's Christmastime, which means it's time to break out the old classics such as It's a Wonderful Life, A Christmas Story, Christmas Vacation, etc. It also means that it's time for my mother and I's favorite holiday tradition of binge watching all of the cheesy Lifetime Christmas movies the channel has to offer.

Oh Lifetime, you really know how to make a change in personality for the holidays. Instead of your usual depressing crime story retellings you instead give us fantastic romantic films with the exact same plot every time. Except a few, aka the one where you have an actual snowman come to life and fall in love with a lady (and yes that's real). Trust me I love them with all of my heart but I can perfectly summarize what happens in each of them:

Meet the female protagonist! She's either that one chick from that one thing you saw in the 90's

(Ashley from Fresh Prince of Bel Air and Michael from Roswell)

or..she's a complete newcomer.

She absolutely loves Christmas.

Or....she hates it and there's a secret behind it.

With the holidays coming up she has an event that she's looking forward to that gets her all caught up in the drama. In fact she'll get so caught up that her best friend, that has this type of personality:

will have to tell her things like, "When are you gonna settle down?" or "Sweetie you need a break".

The main character, then meets her love interest in a meet cute that's forcibly awkward.

Once it comes to date time they start to talk about what the holidays were like for them as kids, you know like you do on casual first dates, and the female protagonist will bring up a precious and oddly specific family tradition she has from her family.

The guy then usually responds with

"Oh my gosh that's so weird! I know no one who does that".

Drama soon starts to ensue with the big event causing the protagonist to get stressed whilst she still manages to flirt with her one date love interest. Cue a montage!

This will include the couple then doing cute and cheesy things with the montage ending on the man doing that one specific tradition with the protagonist and she happy cries saying "Thank you for making me believe in Christmas again"

Suddenly, whats this! Oh no a misunderstanding happens between the couple, and now she's walking away crying as the love interest stands there looking forlorn.

Cue another montage of all the happy times they had,it was a magical 3 days they spent together.

Eventually, most likely the next day, the protagonist gets over her love interest and moves on with her best friend to finish up the event she's planning for claiming to be a "strong, independent woman now"

Finally the big event arrives and what's this? There's a tall dark stranger in the back watching the protagonist do whatever it is she does best. Why I believe it's the love interest who's come to apologize, who would've saw that coming?

The protagonist and quirky best friend spot the love interest and the friend offers to give him a talkin' too but the protagonist has to hold her back

She says that she will go talk to him and tell him to leave.

Shocker he doesn't though. They end up apologizing to each other and make up, finding their relationship once again rekindled and possibly a proposal is included.

Cover Image Credit: She Knows

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What Your Hogwarts House Says About You

Get yourself sorted and find out where you belong in the world of witchcraft and wizardry.
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Sorting at Hogwarts is a big deal. Being sorted into a house is essentially being placed into a family while you are away from home learning about witchcraft and wizardry. Your house is made up of the people you will live with, go to classes with, play Quidditch with and everything in between. You basically spend 24/7 with them. Your Hogwarts house is your home away from home.

When you get sorted into a house, it is based on your personality traits. The people in your house are typically like-minded people who display the same characteristics as you.

When you’re a first year at Hogwarts, the minute you set foot in the castle you are swept into the Great Hall to have the ancient Sorting Hat placed on your head. This Sorting Hat decides which “family” you’ll be spending your seven years with.

For some, it is very obvious which house they will be in, due to certain personality traits they possess. For others, they may exemplify traits that fit a multitude of houses and are uncertain where they may end up.

To find out where you belong, you can take the official "Harry Potter" Sorting Hat quiz at Pottermore.com. For all you muggles out there, these are the characteristics that the houses possess and what your house says about you:

Gryffindor: The house of the brave, loyal, courageous, adventurous, daring and chivalrous. Those who stand up for others are typically Gryffindors. Brave-hearted is the most well-known Gryffindor characteristic, and Gryffindors are also known for having a lot of nerve.

Gryffindors are people who hold a multitude of qualities alongside the ones listed, making them a very well-rounded house. People who are Gryffindors are often people who could fit nicely into another house but choose to tell the sorting hat they want Gryffindor (there's that bravery). "Do what is right" is the motto Gryffindors go by.

Being a Gryffindor means that you're probably the adventurous and courageous friend, and you are usually known for doing what is right.

Ravenclaw: The house is known for their wisdom, intelligence, creativity, cleverness and knowledge. Those who value brains over brawn can be found here. Ravenclaws often tend to be quite quirky as well. "Do what is wise" is the motto they strive to follow.

Though Ravenclaws can be know-it-alls sometimes, they most likely do know what the wisest decision is.

If you are known for being the quirky friend, the smartest in the group or just great at making wise decisions, you're definitely a Ravenclaw.

Hufflepuff: This house values hard work, dedication, fair play, patience, and loyalty. Hufflepuff’s are known for being just and true. "Do what is nice" is their motto.

Hufflepuff is known as the “nice house” and believes strongly in sparing peoples feelings and being kind. This is not to say that Hufflepuffs aren't smart or courageous. Hufflepuffs just enjoy making others happy and tend to be more patient towards people.

If you ever find that you are too nice for your own good and cannot bear to hurt someone’s feelings, congratulations, you are a Hufflepuff.

Slytherin: This is the house of the cunning, prideful, resourceful, ambitious, intelligent, and determined. Slytherin's love to be in charge and crave leadership. "Do what is necessary" is the motto of this house.

Slytherin is a fairly well-rounded house, similar to the other houses. They are loyal to those that are loyal to them just as Gryffindors are and are intelligent as Ravenclaws.

Slytherin house as a whole is not evil, despite how many dark wizards come out of this house. That is merely based on the choices of those wizards (so if your friend is a Slytherin, don’t judge, it doesn’t mean they are mean people). Slytherins do, however, have a tendency to be arrogant or prideful. This is most likely due to the fact that everyone in Slytherin is exceedingly proud to be there.

What Hogwarts house you’re in says a lot about the person you are, the traits you possess and how you may act in some situations. But in the end, your house is really just your home that is always there for you. Always.


Cover Image Credit: Warner Bros Pictures

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5 Reasons Why The Saints Are Inbound To Win The Super Bowl

With the Saints rolling this year, there are 5 crucial reasons why they have a great chance to make the Superbowl.

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When you're reading this is February, you're gonna ask yourself, "How did he know?" I'm a wizard; that's why I know the Saints are going to the Superbowl this year. I'm just kidding, but in all seriousness, I can say with confidence that the Saints have one of the better chances in the NFL to make it to the Superbowl. Below are 5 reasons why they'll make the Superbowl in February 2019.

1. Breesus Christ

The Saints have Drew "freaking" Brees. I literally do not need to say more, but I will anyway.

Drew Brees is the best quarterback in the league period. He will break the record for most passing yards in a career this season, and he has the record for highest completion percentage. To all the people that say Tom Brady is better, you're wrong. Tom Brady has always had a defense to rely on when he needed; Drew Brees hasn't.

Whenever the Saints need Brees, he's always there. The Saints rely on him to get them out of big holes and us Saints fans know that he's the best QB in the league and will lead us to another Superbowl this year.

2. Lighting and Thunder

Alvin Kamara and Mark Ingram being the best running back duo in the league isn't new news. We saw all of last season that Ingram was a bruiser and Kamara was a shifty back. They form a lighting and thunder duo. This season, Ingram has been suspended for the first four games and the Saints were still able to go 3-1. Just imagine how great the Saints are going to be when Ingram comes back this week. It's going to be SCARY.

How do defenses stop Kamara, Ingram, Brees, and Thomas? Defenses beware because the Saints are marching in.

3. Can't Guard Mike

Michael Thomas has been unstoppable this year. No one can guard him. In my opinion he's the best receiver in the league, and while others disagree, they can't deny the impact Thomas has had for the Saints. With the best QB in the league, Thomas is in a prime position to lead a major push to the Superbowl for the Saints. When the offense is rolling, no one can stop the Saints. Cornerbacks can prepare as hard as they need, but they can't guard Mike.

4. Boonk Gang

The Saints defense made major strides last year and helped propel them to many wins. If not for a freak play that resulted in the Saints losing in the divisional round, I believe the Saints would have moved on to the Superbowl. While the defense has been pretty bad at the beginning of the season, in week three, the Saints defense showed what they are capable of. With Ingram coming back and controlling the pace of the offense, watch for the defense to get much better through the season.

5. "Put me in Coach Payton"

Sean Payton may be the second best coach in the league after Bill Belichick.

Coach Payton has had the Saints offense in the top 10 offenses every single year since he became head coach in 2006. With his offensive creativity and his ability to use players such as backup QB Taysom Hill in positions where no other coach would dare to use them, Coach Payton will be the driving force in leading the Saints to the Superbowl.

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