"No family is perfect... We argue. We fight. We even stop talking to each other at times. But in the end, family is family... The love with always be there." - Unknown
Family. Family is such a hard topic to talk about at times. Sometimes family can be fun. Sometimes family can be entertaining. Sometimes family can be pain and torture. But more specifically, siblings can be rather tough. Most people don't realize that my brother and I were never as close as we are today (maybe when we were younger).
At such a young age, my brother and I were raised in several places. When I was five and he was three, my mother took us from our home in Florida to live in Georgia with our grandmother. I remember us being so shy as we arrived at a new home, a new town, and having a new family. From there, my brother and I entered preschool and pre-K at a daycare center called "An Apple A Day Learning Center" in Duluth, where my grandmother lived (and still is living there). My mother was able to get a job at multinational insurance company called AIG. Every single Monday thru Friday, we would attend the daycare center learning about different things and having our mother come get us to go home right after her shift ended. Throughout our whole daycare time, my brother would be so protective of me, even if I was the eldest one. Whenever we had play time, I always loved to hang out in the swings. I remember that one day where I wanted to play on the swings but one kid wasn't being nice and fair. He had been swinging for a pretty long time and I wanted a turn as well. My brother went behind him and pushed him off, letting me have a chance with the swing. We got in trouble but it showed how much my brother cared for me and would do anything for me.
As we grew older, things began to change. Certain people in our lives drove my mother away, but my grandmother wouldn't allow us to go with her. Instead, we continued to stay with our grandmother and my mother went to live in North Georgia with my grandfather. I remember us feeling lost and broken that my mother was gone but somehow we managed. From then on, my grandmother became our guardian. She became our mother. We continued to grow and change as we entered an older school called Chattahoochee Elementary. We lived like any other children with their parents, except we had a grandmother as our parent. We learned at school and came home and to lessons when we did something wrong.
When I was eight and my brother was six, my mother came to visit us. This time, she wasn't alone. She, who was pregnant, brought a husband and a child. My brother and I were so happy that we were getting siblings. Soon, they came to live with us when I was ten and my brother was eight. We had this really big family reunion with relatives from Canada and France coming to see us. Our youngest brother, who was just a few months old, was the center of the attention. Because he was the youngest, I found myself favoring him amongst my other brothers, my blood brother included. That was the start of us growing apart.
Going to school, we met different people and found the same things in common with these people. Soon, my brother and I began to have our own friends and hung out with them instead of each other. My brother found love in certain things that I never really found myself liking. I, being me, thought it was weird. I thought he was weird and "uncool". So I pushed him away. Whenever he tried to come chill with me and my friends, I'd always push him away and tell him to go away and hang out with his own friends. Whenever I had my girl friends over in my room, he would always look at what I was doing. It always bothered me when he did that. I wanted him to leave us alone. I know now it was just because he wanted to check up on us, making sure we were okay. He was just looking out for me. But back then, I didn't know. We grew apart even more and had our own lives, never speaking our feelings to one another. We lost that sibling touch.
The summer after graduation (summer of him starting his senior year) really changed my life. My grandmother, when we were younger, took us to church. We grew up at our church. I didn't start seeking God until I was in seventh grade when I was baptized. However, I strayed away from God. My brother was a lot more active in our church's youth group, becoming apart of this small group of team leader. I was able to drive on my own now so I took my brother to church on most Sundays. Sometimes, I would be up so late watching movies or writing that I sometimes overslept, missing the service. However, my brother always managed to find someone to take him to church. He brought home lessons that our pastor taught that day. I would sit and listen because I was intrigued by how much God was working in my brother. It really made me come back to God. Every night, I would sit in his room and have a time where we read the Bible together. Actually, he read and I listened. And I'd watch him write in his little journal on what that verse meant to him. I learned a lot from him. We began to grow close again, telling each other our feelings and whatnot.
College started and I never knew how much I missed my brother. I would text him throughout the day even though I knew he was still in school. Sometimes I would spam him because I missed him so much. My room turned into a guest room for our relatives to stay in so whenever I came home for the weekend, I would have a sleepover in his room and soon, our little brothers and mother came to join us in this little sleepover. They were fun nights. When it was just the two of us, I would tell him everything I went through and ask him for advice. First, he would say, "Pray to God on what you should do." Then, he would tell me his opinion of the situation. We grew a lot closer. Things happened and I moved back home instead of staying in the dorms. We still had our little sleepovers once in a while but now, I was able to attend church with him on Sundays. Most Sundays, I would be busy with work and school, that I wasn't able to attend church. But we were still able to seek God as we read His word every night.
The end of my brother's senior year of high school was the hardest time of my life. He made the decision of wanting to join the Marines. He said this was God's calling for him. And he wanted to join the Marines so badly. Not all of us, my family, were happy with this decision. I was happy for him. He wants to be in the Marines. Just thinking about it made him happy. I wanted him to be happy. Most importantly, I wanted him to go for himself and not for anyone else. My grandmother was scared for him. At times, I thought he was getting spoiled more than me. But it was because he was going to do active duty. My grandmother was scared that we might lose him. For this, I always prayed to God for comfort. After graduation, he had a little over a month to spend some time with us before he left for Marine boot camp. My granduncle bought him a plane ticket to go to France for his graduation gift. He went and I missed him. A new app called "Bitmoji" came out and I would text him daily with a Bitmoji that said, "I MISS YOU, BRO." He LOL'd and said that I was crazy. It was in fact true. I was crazily missing my brother.
When he came home and was getting ready to leave, I held a goodbye party for him. I invited all his friends from school, church, and our family plus family friends. That night was a night to say goodbye because in just two days, he would be leaving. Those two days came and it was the hardest goodbye I have ever done in my life. I thought it would be a nice goodbye and "I love you" with no tears. Nope. I cried so badly. Three months with no electronic communications was a big no-no for me. How was I able to send him a text daily, to make sure he was alright? When he left, the letter sending was difficult. I sent him several letters that actually didn't arrive to him for about two weeks. And he went throughout those week without a single letter from anyone. I was devastated and pretty upset with the postal delivery service.
Now, in just a few days, my brother will be graduating from boot camp. I am so happy and so excited to see him again. We have grown up with several issues in the way, pushing each other away and coming back together again. I miss him so much. I cannot wait to see him soon!
