Graduating from college is an emotional time to say the least.
People are transitioning into adulthood, preparing for their first taste of the good old 9-5, and saying their goodbyes to life on a campus surrounded by their friends, learning in the classroom, and partying a bit too much. The bubble is bursting and when it pops, it hurts. But this sudden change isn't all bad.
For me, my graduation from The College of the Holy Cross was the first time in my life I was genuinely rattled by the concept of impending doom. My junior and senior years on "The Hill" were the best years of my life-- I was pursuing a major (English) that I adored, made friends with people I would never want to lose, and felt free for the first time. I put myself first and felt glimpses of what it was to be happy. Compared to my high graduation that I debated even attending due to total indifference, commencement on May 24th was both one of the most exciting and daunting days of my life (including the CRUDE 6 AM wake up call). I'm sure I'm not alone in my part nervous, part proud stance on completing undergrad, but something I did not see coming was how it was going to feel returning to "normal" life once I left campus for the last time.
It hit me about two weeks later how much I took for granted in college.
Even though most of us were "ballin' on a budget," the ability to do whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, without answering to anyone or worrying about much became a fond memory. Reality-- money, getting a job, logistics, and straight up adulting-- hits hard. And one does not really understand it until it happens. The kicker, however, is maintaining contact with people with whom you would spend HOURS talking, partying, and just living it up poses a serious challenge. Physical distance becomes your biggest obstacle. In my personal experience, one of my best friends and roommates my senior year traveled to Jordan for the summer, just to start her master's program in China in the fall. Another of my friends will be entering training for Intelligence in the Air Force in Texas. My parents-- with whom I currently live much to my dislike-- are in Chicago, Illinois. 16 hours by car from the majority of my friends in the Boston area that I am trying to move back to in the near future.
The real hurt started to hit when, after about a month and taking it upon myself to check-in with several of the people I loved to see almost every day, suddenly our close, late night convos came to a halt.
At first, I blamed myself for not being a great friend, maybe not putting in enough effort. But I also knew that they could reciprocate that effort if they wanted. So here lies the lesson post-grad that no one likes to acknowledge, but is TOO REAL. You will lose contact with people. And it's ok. Adulting is one of those things where you don't necessarily talk to people every day anymore.
Sure, the real ones will always be there, but some of your friends will be more distant.
And sure, it hurts a bit, but it is not anyone's fault per say. Everyone is trying to transition into post-college life. School no longer connects everyone as it used to. But hey, you can still visit. You can still talk, maybe just less often. You will miss those amazing times at 2 am in Ubers, those times you thought you would rather die than stay up another hour writing in the library, those times you didn't think you could be any happier at a party with your favorite people. And that's ok-- it's a real thing and it's good that you have those things to hold onto. Those pictures with your friends like time stamps of those crazy stories someday your kids will be laughing at.
Life is good, it's just an adjustment. You're doing great. Don't forget it.
