Summer 2016 started off great. I finished my second year of college at the end of April and moved back home to Brooklyn on May 6. I already had jobs lined up for the whole summer and three trips planned. I was ready for the school year to be over and for the summer to start.
I was barely home a week when I heard the news. At that time, I had been employed as a full-time nanny. The oldest daughter, Reilly, was still at school and her younger sister, Violet, was taking a nap – prime Facebook time. As I scrolled down my Newsfeed, I was shocked to see that a member of the Nyack College community had suddenly passed away – and it wasn’t an old cranky professor.
Zahir Edwards was a rising sophomore and a big contributor to our men’s basketball team. He was active and healthy, which made it such a shock when he suddenly collapsed when playing basketball while visiting family in St. Maarten. Zahir had a big personality that was always upbeat and jovial. His absence will definitely be noticed at Nyack.
Learning about Zahir’s death hit me a lot harder than I expected it to. While I knew him and would say we were friends, I was not very close to him. Most of our conversations included friendly banter. On more than one occasion, he jokingly said that I spent more time in the weight room talking to my friends than I did actually working out (possibly true). When I first read the article that he had passed, I was instantly brought to tears. I continued to scroll down Facebook and see post after post of fellow Nyack students giving tribute to Zahir’s life. The more I saw, the more I cried. And the more I felt the urge to go into the room next to me, pick up Violet -- the sleeping two-year-old -- and hold her close in my arms.
I was suddenly reminded of the frailty of life.
The death of Zahir was the first death in my life to be sudden and unexpected. I think that’s why it hit me so hard. The cliché came true: you never when the last time you’ll talk to someone will be. Take advantage of the moments you have with those you know. Be careful what you say to them and how you treat them, because once they're gone, you’ll be reliving in your head every moment you had with them and wishing you had just one more.
With Zahir’s death so fresh in my mind, hearing about the death of Christina Grimmie and the Orlando nightclub shooting hit me like a ton of bricks. Having experienced the sudden death of a friend of mine, I felt much more pain for the friends and families of those victims than I would have without my experience. Hearing about death is always tragic, but being able to fully understand the shock of sudden death makes it so much more meaningful. I feel so much pain for the families who will never see their loved ones again – because I can relate. Forty-nine people died on June 12 in Orlando, Florida. But they are each more than a number; they are each a face with story. They each came from a community of family and friends who continue to mourn their death, even though the newscaster moved on to talking about "politics." They each impacted lives for better or worse. They are each a Zahir.
Just like Nationwide always reminds us: life comes at you fast. Disaster can strike at any moment. Cherish those you love, speak words of kindness, and make every moment count.
Learn more about each of the Orlando nightclub shooting victims: Orlando nightclub shooting: Read about the victims. You can also read more on Zahir Edwards here: Zahir Edwards, Gone Too Soon (1996-2016).
