People Lie. It’s just something that we all do. We try our best to stay honest and we all know that dishonesty isn’t something to be proud of. So, why do we do it all the time? What are the things we lie about the most?
In a world filled with bright blue screens and constant social chatter, it is easy to point the finger at the internet. Yes, Pinocchio grew a long nose but was his nose as long as our Instagram feeds or Snapchat streaks? Here are five things we all lie about on the internet.
1. You read the terms and conditions before you agreed
I would love to see actual, statistical research as to how many people read the terms and conditions. Does anyone even know what they are? Honestly, I don’t think I would trust anyone who actually took the time to read ten pages of legal and technical crap.
2. Your age
Did you know that Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and Snapchat all have age requirements? Yeah, same here. Apparently, you have to be of age to go on certain websites. However, I’m sure you already knew that. Without any legitimate research, I can guarantee you that all of us clicked and said we were 18 years old when in reality we were just annoying twelve-year-olds that thought we were too cool for school.
3. You asked your parents’ permission to join Club Penguin
If you were ever a child who liked fun then you know what Club Penguin is. For those of you who were sad kids with no joy in your childhood, Club Penguin was an online Disney game where you picked a Penguin avatar and lived a really cool, fake life.
On every Disney Channel commercial, you would hear some peppy white kid say, “ask your parent's permission before joining!” Seriously, if you actually asked them for permission you were probably a geek and I wasn’t friends with you. I mean, who asks their mom to play with a puffle at the pizza parlor? Not me!
4. What you look like
This is my favorite lie on the internet. It started out on Myspace a while ago with overly edited pictures and hella makeup. We then progressed to Facebook and used our awful photoshop skills to create the “perfect” profile picture.
Today we live in the Snapchat and Instagram era where you literally have a filter for everything. Looking pale? Slap on the Slumber filter. Looking a little bloated? Facetune that sh*t. Wish you were a cute, big-eyed, cartoon animal? Snapchat is the place for you. I can promise you now that my Instagram feed is not pictures of Julia, they are pictures of Jessica my hot, edited twin.
5. How great your life is
The biggest lie of them all! So, I’m not ripping on anyone and saying they have a crappy life; however, no sane person is going to post that they just lost their job or got a divorce. The internet is a place in which we create false realities and fantasize over the better versions of ourselves.
It’s quite dark if you think about it but it’s also a glimmer of hope and humanism. Sure, I probably don’t have a picture-perfect life and you may not be as tan and rich as you say you are online...but that’s the point of the internet!
Think of the world wide web as the foam pit of the world; there are scary jungle gyms you can fall off of and trampolines you can twist an ankle on but the foam pit is always fun and makes you feel better. Just don’t stay in the pit too long because you might get lost.
